Going slowly crazy still

[Gwenivere]

Ya know, ya find you aren’t the brightest crayon in the box in withdrawl.

In my attempt at a gradual quit, I allotted myself 14mgs. of nicotine as that is what I got when smoking exclusively. 4 real cigs and 10 lozenges. Withdrawl has hit hard and in doing the math of what I’m getting now is barely 3 cigs and 6 lozenges. I didn’t put it all together, even tho it feels like hell. I’ve dropped to 9mgs. a day. Sometimes less. What I do wonder is if this also involves withdrawal from chemicals added to make tobacco more addictive. Tho a search of American Spirit, supposedly without, says its intense too. I called Niciderm about the patches and nixed the 21’s as that would take me to more than I was used to and have to get used to 14 which is still more, so opted to buy the 7’s with the lozenges for break thru's. I also wonder if my using oxygen occasionally is a shock to my system. Mostly I think it is how this has become the center of my universe from when I wake up til I go to bed. Gettting up always involves a head rush to remind me. My biggest challenge is my anxiety disorder meds aren’t as effective in this stress. I add in the 24 hour back induced pain and emotional struggles of personal reasons. I’m also frustrated that I often can’t do anything strenuous because of shakes and tremors.

So this is just me going......duh. Thinking I was getting what I did when I had dropped 5mg. Like I said, not the sharpest tack in the cork board.

[Lauralives]

The brain seems to skip a beat after quitting too.  Takes a while to get all those wires firing again and eventually they come back even stronger and sharper.  Sorry you are going through so much and having pain too!  We kid ourselves into believing that cigarettes make us calmer when all the science confirms they only amp us up.  It will all come together but patience is difficult when you are going through it.  Good luck to you!  Laura

[autumnpepper]

Have you read the easy quit book?  I found it extremely interesting.  After reading that free book online, I totally changed my quit strategy.  I had my quit kit all ready.  But after reading about the addiction and how soon the nicotine leaves your body, I decided not to replace cigarettes with anything.  Now I'm only on day 5, and I wasn't a heavy smoker, but I'm doing ok.  I may have to make changes in my quit plan, but so far so good.  It's the knowledge that's so powerful.  We have to try and change the way we think.  

Good luck to you.  Hope your quit gets easier.  NOPE

5 DOF

[McCarron]

I read the easy way to stop smoking by Allen Carr a few years ago and was successful quitting.it wasn't super easy, but easier than the other times I had tried. I did relapse about at the three month mark. I was a fool not to get on the quit path again right away. My relapse has been a long three years. just now trying to work up the nerve to try again. I am working on getting a support group going in my community which I believe is the missing link for me. I have three people already. My quit date is April 1st. I think this community will be of help as well. good luck to you!

[virgomama]

I think it's all tying in together to make you feel like you're feeling.  It sounds to me like your mind is running you through every scenario it can think of to keep you from tackling this addiction.  Mine did the same thing.  For years actually.  Here were some of my mind's tricks. 

I'm going to keep smoking but I'm only going to smoke organic tobacco and roll my own.  

I'm only smoking 5 cigs a day.

I'm only smoking at home (not)

Ill only smoke on my way to work. (not)

I'll only smoke when my partner smokes. (not)

I'll smoke every 4 hours (until I didn't)

I'll wait till after coffee (never happened)

I'll never be able to quit as long as my partner smokes.

I'm so sick of my lungs feeling trashed.  (light up anyway)

I'll quit when spring comes.  worked for the 1st 2 quits for about 6 months.

There's too much stress right now.

I would sit and watch sometimes as my mind relayed through every tunnel and maze it could find to keep me from going all the way and quitting. Oh yes, then there was the habitrol gum replacement plan.  I'll use those instead.  Lasted about 6 hours and I was lighting up again.  

Finally I found this site and read the RESEARCHED BASED information on what was really happening in my mind and why those thoughts were occuring.  I read about how nicotine literally created new pathways in my brain that needed to be fed, or I would feel uncomfortable.  I realized FINALLY that it wasn't ME having those thoughts, but my NICOTINE ADDICTED brain.  I wanted to quit  Had been wanting to quit for YEARS.  

The patches worked for me when I finally jumped.  I hope they work for you as well.  I hope things get easier for you all around.   I'm sure you have the strength  to see this through.  You've survived a lot already.

[Barb102]

I know you can do this. It’s just hard right now for you. Patches worked this time for me. I never made it before to cold turkey. I guess after 40+ years I had to wean down. Just take the daily pledge and tell yourself you are not going to smoke today. That’s what worked the best for me. Never again was too overwhelming in the beginning. I’m proud to be at 280 days. It was hard work and so worth it. You can and will do this. We are are here for you

[McCarron]

I have smoked for 50 years and I have smoked a pack and a half every day and sometimes more. I have tried most things and would rather go cold turkey but I am starting to think that I will need to use the patch or gum to taper off of nicotine. I curse the day I started this addiction!!!

[virgomama]

After several quits I decided to use the patch.  My reasoning was that the patch would give me time to get a handle on my smoking triggers and then deal with withdrawal.  It worked like a charm for me.  Each individual is different, but for me it made a much easier quit.