Day 3. Frustration and aggravation.

[Kmarie82]

There will be no next time this time. 

Everyone ive ever spoken to has told

me that when they finally quit it was cold turkey, what I wasn’t prepared for is this overwhelming feeling like I’ve lost something (irrational, I know). What is happening there? Perhaps it was because cigarettes started as a way for me to get away from people or situations.. smoking started as an escape and now I don’t have that... pure speculation.

Ive been hiding this habit for years and years, it always embarrassed me- oh yeah... here is the punchline to my own joke I sell medication for ASTHMA AND COPD. So yes, every day for years I felt like a hypocrite... not anymore though. My professional life has been a cycle of

hand sanitizer, ozium or some air freshener ( who am I kidding ... multiple air fresheners) and gum... speaking of

gums there is another benefit I wasn’t thinking about.

Its day three, since this habit never affected my ability to exercise; rephrase “hasn’t” affected my ability to exercise “yet!” I have increased my steps to reach 10 or more miles per day. Reasons being, stress and anxiety as my body tried to clean itself out on top of work and life in general. I have noticed my fuse is short however I refuse to take it out on anyone. My chest is tight, and today I started sneezing a lot.. I’m pretty sure im

goinh to get sick but I’ll deal. My throat hurts, my head hurts... honestly this kind of sucks HOWEVER every time I think I’ll have a cigarette I remind myself that I am in control, I don’t want the cigarette and as in any toxic or abusive relationship (don’t be fooled this is exactly what it is) we find excuses and reasons to stay, this time I won’t, this time I’m actually pissed off these death sticks aren’t illegal.

i downloaded an application called “My Last Cigarette” I like the way it shows me my health stats and savings along with other incentives such as days/time I added to my life - bonus- it’s free.99. 

So as I said, I feel pretty not great but I’m doing it... I also have no clue what I just wrote because im

havinf trouble staying asleep- another fun side affect. I guess I just needed somewhere I could get this junk off my chest literally and figuratively... I have hid this habit for so long that there aren’t very many people I can turn to for support without having to admit that I was smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, likely I’d not appreciate their responses as ignorance is bliss - I guess I turned smoking into my vice.. but now I’m here and I can talk about it.. and the over 50kive literally lit up over my years as a smoker. Regardless, I don’t want to end up in the medications I represent and I don’t want to feel like a hypocrite. Anyways, this has been a rough week- layoffs - and I feel all the feels, I didn’t lose my job and I am thankful but it has made this journey a bit bumpier.

Please share with me that all of this will get better... I need to hear it... 

[YoungAtHeart]

Welcome to our community!

Don't worry about telling people you are quitting.  They knew - you will accept that after you have been quit a bit and can smell a smoker at 50 yards!  No amount of gum or spray or whatever can mask that.  It's just ANOTHER lie the addiction told us! 

I also was an exercise fanatic; I told myself I would quit when it affected my lap swimming.  Trouble is, the change was so gradual, I didn't notice it.  What I DID notice was the improvement in my swim breathing when I quit.  Quite the AHA! moment for me.

There are two parts to this addiction - the physical and the psychological.  What you describe are the result of the physical withdrawal from nicotine.  The worst is the first few days, and then a few weeks while your body adjusts to life without it.  It all WILL end.  If you are getting a cold, you will recover faster if you aren't smoking!

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. You can search for it  or at your local library. Here's a link to a video here on the site which describes nicotine addiction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpWMgPHn0Lo&feature=youtu.be.
 
 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmoking.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises recommended here on the site.
 
 After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.
 
The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand in a place different from when you smoked. Maybe switch to tea for a bit.  If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.
 
You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Keep a cold bottle of water with you from which to sip. Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:
 https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.
 
Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

 Nancy

[Kmarie82]

Thank you. You’re right.. I should notice perhaps I can run after time and

perhaps I can move a little faster... those are the changes I will look

for.

I agree with you that you can smell a smoker but I can’t tell you how many

times someone caught me in the act in shock with a “you smoke!!!”

Anyways I represent brands such as Anoro, Breo, Trelegy and Ventolin... I

know better... we all do. These cigarettes should have been made illegal

years ago. I do not want to use gum or patches- I think my path needs to be

cold turkey and suffer through it, my husband is quitting too or so he

says... but I need to find some new ways of doing things that’s for sure.

Thank you for taking the time to reach out... I’ll likely have a lot to say

in the first couple of weeks and thus far everyone has been very

supportive.

On Thu, Sep 20, 2018 at 10:28 AM Youngatheart.7.4.12 <

[AnnetteMM]

A lot of us felt like cigarettes were our best friends. Quitting can absolutely feel like a loss of sorts. It's not crazy at all. Plus it was the perfect way to get out of social situations. Use the search tool here to find all sorts of great information and support! And welcome.

[AnnetteMM]

PS I hate those Anoro commercials! They don't make any kind of sense and they're so annoying! LOL

[Kmarie82]

It’s true. I think I just need to communicate better when I need space instead of making excuses. It’s annoying really because I feel like I liked smoking... but I used to like a lot of things that I’ve learned to live without... 

Thank You! 

[YoungAtHeart]

When you do the recommended readings, you will discover the lies the addiction tells us.  The reason you thought you liked smoking was because, for a little while, that hit of nicotine gave you a bit of dopamine and shut up the receptors in your brain jonesing for a fix. You felt calmer because they weren't firing away, needing to be fed.

Cigarettes were DESIGNED to keep us addicted.  I was furious when I discovered they put cough suppressants in them to dull our natural response to the poisonous inhalants. 

[Barbscloud]

Welcome to the Ex.  Congrats on those precious 3 days smoke free.  You've come to the right place to get support.  Everything you're saying, we've all said--I like to smoke, I feel like I lost my best friend, etc.  That's why educating yourself about addiction really contributes to success.  And, it will get better.

191 DOF

[elvan]

I reached out to you on a comment you made to tnjhoffman and I told you that YoungAtHeart‌ would be along to welcome you, for all I know, she welcomed you before I told you that.  I don't know how long you smoked for but I can tell you that I stuffed my feelings down with every cigarette I smoked, it was how I and many others, dealt with emotions.  After more than 4 1/2 years, I can PROMISE you that if you stick with your quit, it WILL get better and lo and behold, you will learn that FEELINGS are normal, it is okay to be sad or stressed or angry or happy or any other feeling you can come up with.  When we first stop smoking, the feelings just seem SO INTENSE because we did not learn to deal with them as we were growing up...at least I didn't.  People who never smoked or used any other mood altering substance, learned gradually...when we quit smoking, those suppressed feelings come to the surface and just SEEM bigger than they really are.  WE get stronger, THEY get weaker.  We stop being emotionally stunted and grow into the healthy adults we were always meant to be.  Remember, we are here for you, we will do anything we can to help you, we all want you to succeed.

Ellen

[jconfusion]

I used mint Nicorette gum for 3 months  the third month was me weening myself the gum, but it was a great help with the cravings. mom even told me she was surprised I only used the gum, but I made up my mind for chaoses health, omg I I ran over chaoses tail with my wheel chair, he seems ok I think im more upset than he is and I sat with him for a couple hours and gave him a full body rub down he loved it, lol.