When I was a kid, I loved my round decks of cards. I spent a lot of time at the pool and we played cards endlessly. It was a super carefree, and smoke-free, time of life. The only thing that truly mattered was getting in my 50 laps (what was considered training for the swim team back then) and getting home before dark. When I saw this graphic this morning, I knew it was the one I needed to celebrate day 8. A little throwback. Something to make me smile just because it exists. An image of almost wistful proportion.
Funny how that works, isn't it? You see a picture and boom! You're there.
Before I quit, I would go every morning to the front porch with my dog and coffee and cigs and do puzzles. I haven't done any puzzles for the past week as I didn't want to be on the porch. (I know; I don't need to do them on the porch, but that's my puzzle spot!) I went on the porch this morning as it's raining AGAIN and started doing one of my puzzles. It just didn't feel right, so I came inside for coffee and Perry Mason instead. I just may have to find a new place to do puzzles and forgo the front porch for a while longer.
My jaws are not as tight this morning, but my gums are a little sore still. I didn't dream of smoking last night that I can recall.
The original post was supposed to go up first thing this morning, but apparently I forgot to hit the post button. Ooops.
I'm here now because, even though I will not smoke, I'm super stressed. It's like I'm just getting started all over again. I'm holding onto the days I've stayed quit and will remain quit, but it's weird how the desire to smoke (the addiction) is so derned strong.
I'm in N.O.P.E. mode and will remain there, but it baffles me nonetheless that I/we work so hard to get to this point and still have urges. Frickin addict that I am, I guess that's just the way it is, eh?