I just returned from a psychodrama retreat!!
I would like to share my 1 year anniversary (July 21, 2018).
I thank everyone from this site who helped me.
I stopped a few days before my quit day because one member kept asking "Why not now!" So, I just jumped in by starting with Chantix and Wellbutrin. I took each (Chantix/Wellburtin) for 21 days and detoxed by using this site and eventually joining a support group for smokers using AA 's principles. It was a very safe place for me to cry and look at dysfunctional habits.
I followed directions and asked an elder or a sponsor to share my pressing fears and worries. The sponsor also supported me about the extra pounds. To keep me focused, I volunteered to chair a group. The duties meant showing up an hour before the meeting, setting up and greeting those who came through the door. Somedays it would be one person and myself. On others it would be about 5 in attendance or just me. Just making the meeting a priority, kept me focused, balanced and organized.
Those in attendance would read and study the step for a month. For instance, we are on the 7th step (Humbly asking God (of our understanding) to remove our shortcomings). In reading and studying that step, I am learning to retire some behaviors that were not working. For instance, stop giving unasked for advice to my adult child and grandchild. Being envious and jealous of people who have worked hard for their success, etc. By showing up to the meeting, it was another tool for not taking the first puff.
I know that by completing my first year, i am not finished with educating and understanding why I smoked for 45 years. I have to continue to look at how smoking every 20 minutes kept me from living a productive life. I have gained more time and energy. I continue to seek outside help for my mental health hygiene and for spirituality, I stay opened to understanding whether I have or have not a brief in a High Power.
Again, I thank everyone. While I am on summer break, I hope to stay connected to the site.
Forever
Carolyn
