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The past few days I have had unexplained waves of fear. They don't last very long. I'm just surprised that they come out of no where. They're not cravings or urges. I'm not even sure I'm thinking about smoking when they occur. Just wondering if others have this experience.
I don't think it's a what. It's a feeling like when you think something is wrong, but there's nothing wrong. Your stomach starts turning, but it's not hunger. Maybe it's more like a panic feeling?
That's what I was guessing....panic or anxiety...Perhaps when you recognize that it's coming on, you can immediately try to distract yourself to pull you out of that zone...????
Never had that one happen to me. But I do know when we quit that our brain chemistry changes a bit and that this manifests itself in different ways for different people. I hope you feel better soon!!
ONWARD TO FREEDOM!!!
Chuck
I have posted this to a different discussion but it may be worthy of processing...
Anxiety? I've had a pretty significant uptick in anxiety the last week-10 days. I usually am kinda private about stuff but had confessed to an elder that my brain chemistry is really messed up at the moment- I can literally FEEL it. Like Chuck says, our chemistry does go through some changes.
PLEASE hang in there with me. Xox
I've had this also. For me, I think more sadness than anxiety but it's hard to sort through what's going on sometimes. Wishing you well! ♥
Will do. Lisa.
Sounds to me like a very mild panic attack.....I was subject to those during a PTSD episode and it helped a LOT to go for a quick, brisk walk. You could even march in place for a bit if you can't go outside
Sounds like anxiety. Do some breathing or meditation or both. Try not to feed it.
Maybe I've had something similar. I had intense unpleasant feelings that I could not associate with the desire to smoke or thought of smoking (though they did not exist prior to quitting or they were not long lived because smoking snuffed them out). Over time, I realized that whoosh of anxiety corelated to moments when I finally would have a cigarette before quitting--frustrated, break have a cig, angry--suck on a cig, fearful--have a cig. At first I had no clue as to how to shut the have-a-smoke switch off other than to "bravely" carry on. Thankfully I stayed off the butts no matter what--clarity has won out over dispair. Keep the faith.
maryfreecig Blog what a good writer you are! you have described the tight rope the cigarette smoker walks on between smoking and the symptoms of withdrawal and trying to keep them at bay. Quite the addiction. Sounds like you shut the 'have-a -smoke switch' off. wow. that was life changing. Everything about quitting smoking is good. I think that cigarettes actually make people feel frustrated, angry, fearful but that smokers think that cigarettes relieve these feelings, there the cycle of addiction. Cigarettes relieve the feelings of withdrawal. Temporarily. You Do have to just carry on don't you. Well done!!!!
Agreed!!!
A wise elder told me that Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real Thomas3.20.2010
Here is an article I recently read. Overcoming F.E.A.R.: False Evidence Appearing Real | Awaken
just bookmarked this article Jackie....can't wait to read it!
I think, I experience this too....I didn't realize until it stopped happening, that I'd always faced those situations with a cigarette. I was having anxiety and I was fearful of the unknown.........Hasn't happened for a good stretch of time now......
Everyday seems to be something.... Just keep putting 1 foot in front of the other..........It helps me to remember ...we are all fighting the same battle........
Thanks Jackie. Read it.
"For God gave us a Spirit not of Fear but of POWER and LOVE and Self-Control!"
- 2 Timothy 1:7
Absolutely Thomas!!!!!!!! If we trust the Lord,we will get through this...Sometimes a prayer, gets me through something weird in this journey.
I've also felt jumpy and out of sorts with my guts churning and kinda panicky off and on in the first month or so and didn't believe it was craves or urges but it probably was without me even realizing it, because everything we did was wrapped around the smokes so looking back I think that might have been what was going on with me.
Such wonderful feedback from all of you. Thank you for providing me with resources and support. I imagine it could be anxiety. I've struggled with it most of my life, but this just feels different. I have had my physical for the year, so I know I am physically well. That's a relief. I am putting one foot in front of the other and working through it. Thanks again. xxxooo
Anxiety triggers flight/fight for no logical reason whatsoever. It can be stopped in it's tracks by Yogic or Belly Breathing.
The more you recognize the door of fear begin to open the sooner you can intervene with therapeutic breathing. Sometimes a rubber band around your wrist helps - snap it when you feel fear and then you know what the next step is - Breathe! I've used mints, gum, and SweetTarts to wake my body up to here and now. Then I ask myself (while breathing) Am I safe right here, right now? Then it's OK - I trust in the Lord to take care of me minute to minute. It doesn't always work immediately but it works better and shorter and less intense each time with practice.
Thanks Thomas. Appreciate the feedback
MichelleDiane Deep breath in...exhale slowly, visualize yourself on a beach just relaxing, DO listen to Thomas3.20.2010 and Youngatheart.7.4.12 and all of the people here who have been there. You are doing this...your addiction is going to try to pull out all of the stops to get you back.
Hugs,
Ellen
As you can see, the experience is practically universal. In my life it manifests as high level restlessness. Just can't calm myself for hours and hours. All I can do when that happens is keep telling myself it will pass, it will pass, it will pass.
Ride the wave!
As I am reading the wonderful comments from my ex family I am continuing my journey. Just got back from a morning walk/run. I still had this unsettling feeling (a continuation). I read the suggested articles related to fear and do recognize it on many levels. Today, however, I think the fear made itself known to me whereas yesterday I couldn't put my finger on it. My mind today is being overtaken by thoughts of smoking. I am not acting on those thoughts, but notice they are trying to optimize my brain. So, what to do? Well #1 Don't smoke no matter what #2 Get up and get moving #3 Stay close to this site #4 What ever you have to do except smoke. And, yes, this too shall pass. Thanks again everyone.
Cyber love to all,
Michelle
You've got this quit firmly in your grasp, you are doing great deep breaths and know that we're all here to help you in any way we can, hang on tight and don't let go because you are going to get through this. MichelleDiane
Thanks Marilyn. I am going to work now and decided to put some makeup on to help me...well it just makes me feel good. I will be thinking about the wonderful success stories to continue to motivate me to do the very best. And my best is Not One Puff Ever. Hope your fur baby is okay.
Hugs,
Michelle
MichelleDiane You CAN do this...yes, "this too shall pass"...one step at a time and baby steps absolutely do count. You are already learning so much and growing stronger every day.
Big hugs,
Ellen
Thanks Ellen. Taking baby steps so I don't trip.
Hugs back,
Michelle
I went and book marked all the Blogs to check out.... That has been most helpful to me,when I can find my way back to them.
hope today is a better day for you..........
“I want a dead leaf wrapped in paper and dipped into 7000 deadly chemicals,” said in Daffy Duck's voice! LOL!
Hi Michelle,
I have experienced those as well--fear, followed by anxiety/panic. Mine have usually happened when I'm trying to sleep or when I am asleep and they wake me up. My sleep has been all out of whack in large part due to these.
MichelleDiane , quitting smoking is kind of like transitioning into a butterfly. The fight for the flight to freedom! Enjoy...
Love it IrishRose. I watch the migration every fall. It's spectacular. Can't wait to watch them in the fall when I am smoke free. Not rushing it though. I really want to experience spring and summer, which is in no hurry to come.
-Michelle
Yes, yes, yes! That was part of my plan in quitting. When I first quit, it was hard, but you have to talk your way out of the desire to go back to smoking those coffin nails. You have to take small steps, and then I thought, how cool it would be to experience the four seasons as a non-smoker. If you make it through the four seasons, you are on the road to a beautiful smokefree life.
I just told my husband that I would be an idiot to start smoking again - eight years quit in June. Just one would start me back to sucking the life out of myself again.
I would love to go to Mexico and see the monarchs. They come through here, but I want to experience the massive amounts of those beautiful creatures - to be able to travel so far in their migration is, in itself, an amazement to me.
Irish Rose
That's why I love nature so much. It's filled with beauty and mystery. I am looking forward to fee rejuvenated by all of the wonderment of nature. Who knows maybe one day we can all go to Mexico on an ex trip to see this miracle.
-Michelle
Sounds perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep taking 1 step at a time...doing great....... Today is: Prairie 60 DOF
Thanks Prairie
Can't wait to see you flying too MichelleDiane! Deep breathing was my answer, and still is to all feelings of fear/anxiety/cravings. When I don't know exactly what is happening, I don't wait to define the feeling, I start practicing the deep breathing. By the time you do it 10-15 times, the feeling might be gone.
You are doing great!
Thank you Daniela. I'm working through the thoughts and finding that I can do it.
-Michelle
MichelleDiane , come to think of it, were those waves of fear hitting you while you were doing your income taxes for 2017??? I am trying to finish mine up at the witching hour, and got hit with a big wave.
Have a beautiful smokefree day!!!
Irish Rose
Interesting thought IrishRose. Actually I think it was fear of success and the irrational thought of never being able to smoke again. I believe that as I was getting more and more days won the nicodemon was trying his best to pull me in, so I wouldn't be getting rid of him. Sadly, he won that time, but won't this time.
-Michelle
MichelleDiane I remember someone here telling me that she could NOT use the mantra NOPE because that word EVER made her feel a sense of terror...think of your addiction as a toddler throwing a major fit in a grocery store. That toddler will do anything he or she can think of to get his or her way. You might be better off using Dale's favorite, "I don't do that any more" or else OldBones-Larry saying that is MY favorite, "One step and then another will get you to where you want to be." It really IS one step at a time...one experience at a time. Oh taxes...I don't even OWE anything but, for some reason, they TERRIFY me and I think I have put our accountant's kids through college because we had to file business taxes and I could not figure out how. I made my husband give up his business license because he has carried a loss for years and years and who do you think gets stuck paying to have the taxes done? Yep, you got it...ME! I was whining to the Commissioner of Revenue in our city and she told me that she will do our taxes for us for nothing...I said "WHAT?" She says she does it for anyone who is a resident, she advises doing it early rather than near the deadline. I pay taxes at my job just in case he ever earns anything, hahahaha, that's NOT really a risk. In any event, I will get a refund that will pay me back for getting the taxes done.
IrishRose You are going to feel SO MUCH BETTER once those taxes are DONE!
Ellen
Taking it in the day Ellen. Isn't that all we can do? I just took a walk between clients. So amazing it was not with a cigarette in hand. I enjoyed the wind and was picturing my lungs filling up with crisp clean air (well, it should really be warmer and pollution does taint the air, but I digress). It helps if I can envision the benefits. Also, my hands don't smell, so when I was writing with my pen I was happy that it just smelled like Jergens. My hair also doesn't stink like smoke. It is the little things that add up to the big things because they are not little at all. Don't mind me I'm in a rambling mood.
Much love,
Michelle
The hair was a big thing for me. I have a head of it, and it is unreal how your hair can hold onto odors. It smells good now!
Irish Rose
MichelleDiane You are doing great...remember if a day is too long...shorten it to an hour or a minute or a second...you get the picture. Oh I LOVE the way my hands and my hair smell, I so hated that smoke smell.
IrishRose Oh nooooooooo, I thought that expression came from Dale...oops. I am so glad I don't have to pay anything...just getting everything together is torture. Without the business, it will be MUCH easier and we may not even itemize, except for my husband's medical bills which are crazy.
Ellen
elvan , medical bills are a complete nightmare to figure - harder than keeping track of a business!!! You know what is insane? I do hope your husband and YOU are doing much better. You have had your share of weight bearing hardships, no doubt. Big ((((hug)))) for you, Dear Friend!
Irish Rose
Thanks IrishRose, he had his heart attack in January of 2018 so the real medical bill nightmare will be next year. We have folders and folders and folders of bills from different places...most of them are no recognizable. Oh well, this too shall pass.
Wait a minute. I thought I was the one who coined that expression "I just don't do that anymore." Geesh!
hahahahaha
Had to pay the man AGAIN, but I am getting better at lowering it to virtually nothing.
Irish Rose
Michelle
Glad to see you've got the help you needed already. Just wanted to add, I have had what I would describe as overwhelming feelings of sadness for no apparent reason. They do pass, but I have talk myself through it.
Thanks Barbs...I'm talking and listening
Glad you made it through it Michelle, I am having fear today too, fear that I'll go back to smoking again, fear of failure, fear what if I just can't do this. The only way out is through it! I have also been deep breathing to get through it.
You're doing great!!
Thanks Christine. Breathing is definitely on my list of things to do (and not just because it's a necessity to live). Keep breathing!
You have been quit since February 25, Christine13 , so you have almost two months under your belt. You are doing awesome, but you have got to stick with it. Sometimes, I think we confuse a sadness we experience with quitting smoking, when the fact of the matter is that something just has us down right sad, but we cannot put a finger on its source. It could be anything that triggers that sadness, and we are so fast to blame the fact that we have not had a cigarette. Unfortunately, we used cigarettes as a crutch to get us through just about any sad situation, and when we quit smoking, we lose our crutch, and have to deal with the situation of sadness head on with our hearts instead. If that does not make any sense, Christine, a lot of things I say make no sense, because I get kind of deep sometimes with what I say. You are doing so well, so allow your body four seasons of a quit. This way you will have experienced so many different things in life without that crutch. You will be a better, stronger, richer person for it, not to mention smelling a heck of a lot better. I promise, you will look back on when you did smoke cancer sticks and smile, because it gets easier and easier as each day passes.
(((((hug))))) for you.
Irish Rose
I recognise my experience in your descriptions. This week I have been putting my fingers in my mouth, like biting nails but just biting the tip of my thumb, the skin of my thumb even split a little from repeatedly getting wet and drying. I've related the fear to overwhelm, but it's reminding me of when i used to smoke to have a break and pause for the next task. It is a good idea to go slow and steady, work alternative breaks in. I met a man the other day and he seems keen to see where we might go, stayed at his this weekend and saw him today but trying to pace myself, so many relationship expectations overwhelm, also with the Norway sailing coming up and the extensive house stuff I choose to sort out in the next few months, slow and steady wins the race. Saying that I just wrote my first art proposal email without smoking (and nicodemon reminded me that deserves 'motivation', 'anxiety alleviation', 'reward', 'calm-ener') Attended my first protest today without smoking (and was glad) Luckily I had the gentle chap's hand to hold when I felt overwhelm there. I keep just writing out my stuff out on here, staying close especially when I don't feel 100% safe in my quit. I wish you all well but verbiage is necessary for my own reflection and understanding here so sorry if i'm not responding much directly. Yak yak yak! That arts deadline was midnight this evening so I'm writing this at half past, wide awake. Films calm me so I'm going to watch a bit of one now x
Oh, Tessa! Your life does sound intriguing !!!!
Protests and gentlemen and sailing trips?!
Sigh.
Dont mind if I live vicariously through you.
Xox
soccer mom. 3 teenagers. Lol .
Sure, and I will live vcariously through you too sometimes ;-) Your lifestyle sounds like my aunts (although her kids have moved out now), it can be a breath of fresh air to hear from her about her Women's Institute work and her fitness, her contented more settled, comfortable, suave lifestyle xxx Then again "soccer mom" also reminds me of a few lines from the dodgy restaurant scene in the film Bridesmaids.
Fear......of what exactly?