I stop for a few weeks then smoke for 1 day then stop again. The guilt kills me the next day. How do I get over the hump?
It has got to be torture to keep starting over again and again. Why not try to get over that initial hump and keep on not smoking? Give it a try - that is what keeps me going some days - I simply don't want to start on day one again.
Make a plan - of what to do besides smoke - the possibilities are really endless. Take a walk, take a bubble bath, do a puzzle, play a game, read a book, cook a good dinner, call a friend, write a blog on becomeanan, read other people's blogs on becomeanex, go shopping, go to the zoo, etc. You get it - do whatever is necessary to NOT smoke!
Try the Alan Carr book on smoking, it is very insightful. You may find it very helpful in some of your questions.
By not taking a single puff and making a commitment that no matter what you will not smoke. Make a vow that you will do something else.
You must believe in yourself and be willing, determined and totally committed to succeed then you'll be successful one precious Smokefree Day at a time or hour minute or even a second at a time then each day you get through is another Day WON but you must stick with your precious quit.....
What To Expect In The First Four Months
Actually I did the same thing.
Understanding the WHY behind the addiction was what finally got me . It was the key that changed everything for me.
Read Allen Carr’s book, The Easy Way to stop smoking. His book explains it well and it’s a fast read.
You’ll eventually get tired of going around the same ole mountain and dig your heels in and quit. But meanwhile read the book and get familiar with the tools that will help you have a successful quit that’s permanent. Your chances of staying quit depend on the time knowledge and real effort you put forth to understand the WHY.
Good luck and glad your here.
I think you get over the hump by educating yourself about this addiction. AND by making a dedicated commitment to becoming smoke free.
Why do you feel guilty? Let's think about that for a bit. Do you feel guilty because you know smoking is harming you and you still can't commit to quitting it? Or are you feeling guilty because you've said "today I'm going to QUIT" and then give in? Do you feel guilty because you have loved ones who care about you and want you to quit?
Guilt is not a positive motivating factor that makes for a long-term quit. So - what is? Well, I'd ask you - why are you here? What is that motivating force that caused you to come here and sign up and be a part of this site and on-line support community? Plug into THAT. Because that is the BEST part of you. The part of you that knows better. That is the wisest and most self-loving part of you.
How do you get over the hump? By self-discipline, commitment, by accepting your choice to quit, by keeping an open spirit and open mind to learning, by a willingness to grow and change and adapt and develop and transform yourself into the New YOU that you will become as a non smoker. Pretty daunting, eh? Yes. But that's what this quitting journey is about. Can you do it? That depends upon you and whether you're willing to take on this journey and say no to craving - no matter what.
You get over the hump by sticking with your commitment - no matter what and no matter how long it takes. Agree to THAT and you'll find there is no hump at all. The hump actually lies in the fact that you haven't yet closed the door on the option to smoke. When it becomes a non-option for you - the hump will be gone.
Extremely well stated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You sound very wise. I think you have many good points for me to ponder. Thanks for the input!!
First thing is first. We Pray or whatever your high power is you ask that you have control of your mind. Once we conquer that FEAR we can began to breathe and regain confidence it's ok you're ashamed. it means you know by Constantly failing at a SMOKE FREE Chance , you are better and when you know better you do better.
Also consider getting off for a week clearing your lungs make a Doctor's Appt. In advance for Chantix or Zyban! Combination therapy is great also the inhaler&pill will be perfect start for you.
Thank you for the input. Prayer is on the top of my to do list. I may have to pray all day everyday but I’m in. Thanks for your help. I’ve beat other addictions so I know I can beat this one.
Absolutely. There is very little difference. Addiction is addiction.
Welcome freenhappy03! Glad to see you on the EX Community. I see you've been a member of BecomeAnEX.org for quite a few years. Definitely curious what finally made you join the community. Looking forward to seeing your quit journey unfold here.
MarkEX Community Manager
Well to be honest health brought me back. Heart attack. Two stents later I knew I had to stop I’m so very fortunate that I had no major damage!! Just have to figure this out.
I'm glad you're well , and those stents were all you needed.
Just consider this; your blood vessels and your heart have told you they will NOT tolerate you smoking. The patency of your stents DEPENDS on your not smoking. You need to take it as an ultimatum. Please. Stented or compromised blood vessels will NOT maintain their patency if you continue to cause them damage.
Smoking needs to be taken out of th realm of options for you.
I don't mean to sound mean or blunt but after serious heart issues, you need to consider smoking as the life or death reality that it is.
Take all the support you can get. Learn about addiction. Stop protecting your addiction. One day at a time, yes you can.
Those first few weeks I asked for help from a source that is bigger than my addiction to remove the compulsion to smoke. I said it OUT LOUD and frequently. Then I began to examine the motivating fear behind the craving. I looked at it squarely. Nine times out of ten, the reasons were unjustified when I closely, consciously, consciously being a big one, payed attention to the LIE!!!. This took much practice, but I was very motivated because I was tired of putting toxic life threatening crap into my body. It sounds like you have a serious vital reason to quit. What with clogged arteries and all. But I also understand addiction. Some how, we addicts think we will quit in time. Be the exception to the rule, or a whole host of other lame alibis. That's the delusional outstanding feature of addiction to anything that keeps us killing ourselves against our own will. Nicotine addition had actually highjacked my choice making powers. NO MORE!!!! Please start your quit again. Guilt is a useless emotion. Drop it. Especially if you think of this as a moral failing. It's not, It's simply a dis-ease. Never give up on trying vtk4ooj6of
John 75 dof after 38 years of sacrificing my free will to Effing tobacco.
OMG how awful for you to be stopping and starting. All you need is to make it through one whole day. You can do it Drop the guilt it never helps. If you don’t have a smoking aid , NRT or prescription RX please speak with your doctor. I didn’t last many days before but I didn’t have aids and this site. You will do this. Like the Met Fan I am always says “you gotta believe!”
we are all here for you
it's fear and not guilt. you fear to relapse . how big it can get, as full blown relapse makes you terrifie.
I am still on track since the relapse. Feeling better and understanding just how strong of addiction this is. Been hard core for a very long time.
thanks for not giving up. your post will be inspiration for many.
On Friday, February 2, 2018, freenhappy03 <firstname.lastname@example.org>
I haven't gone through all the replies, but I think your answer is quite simple; take smoking off the table as an option. Period, the end. Once it is out of the equation, you can read read READ and understand better WHY you keep coming back.
But, for now? Just commit to quitting. And don't ever stop quitting!!!!!!
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