Starting over...

[akerwin10]

So I relapsed and started smoking again... I'm setting my requit day for tomorrow. I'm not one for making excuses but my mother passed away in November and without even thinking about it I picked up a cigarette and started smoking again. I feel like Every time I try to quit it gets harder and harder. So here we go again!

[YoungAtHeart]

Perhaps you are making it more difficult on yourself every time by letting yourself believe you are only going to fail again?

I want you to keep something in mind for THIS quit:  there is never a good reason to smoke; there are only excuses.  If you doubt the wisdom of this, maybe think about what smoking did to make your Mom's passing easier to bear, or helped with the grieving? 

My sympathy to you on your loss - and hoping that good memories, in time, help with the missing.

Let's get your quit done THIS time.  How can we help?

Nancy

[elvan]

So sorry about the loss of your mother.  Sorry you need to start your quit over again.  I do not want to go through starting over again, I also absolutely do not want to smoke.  I know that smoking doesn't help anything, it doesn't fix anything, I know that I want to be free to be myself and free to FEEL.  I KNOW you can do this.  Start with the Daily Pledge every day and go to the Freedom Train and celebrate your numbers as you celebrate others.  I came to this site every morning and every evening, no matter what.  I blogged, I commented, I read all of the blogs that I could find, I reached out to people and they reached back.  This site is very powerful and no matter how hard your addiction has convinced you that quitting is going to be...this site is MORE POWERFUL.

Welcome back,

Ellen

[JACKIE1-25-15]

Click on the link. to read :  Stay connected it may help you. 

[Mandolinrain]

I am so very sorry for the loss of your Mother. I lost one of my quits when my Step Father died years ago. I was so miserable and smoking was a calming thing for me to do.

Many reading this will totally relate. I do. I relate to the fear...to all your saying. Quitting is hard.

Every time I failed it seemed like it got harder and harder to quit....that was certainly me. There really is relief in this though. I didn't get serious enough early enough in my quit therefore I failed. But the truth is exactly what YoungAtHeart said....there is never a good reason to smoke, only excuses. It was hard to hear but it was the truth.

What helped me the most was when I truly made an effort and buckled down and started to apply what I was learning on this site. I read so much I wore out my readers,,lol.

NOBODY on here is perfect in their quit. Many of us struggled so much, failed so much. I did. I swore I would NEVER be able to be quit...but I am here to tell you , it IS doable.!!! I did it.

I am glad you came back. I was scared when I came and went so much in the beginning I figured nobody would like or help me. But nope. I just got love and support. And that, my friend , is what we will give to you .

Welcome Home!

Missy

[MichelleDiane]

I am sure this is a recurring message as I have read all the helpful replies, but I think one more will only reaffirm that we are here to help and not judge.  Quitting is challenging.  I'm new to my quit, but not new to trying to quit.  If it was easy no one would smoke.  Be compassionate with yourself, come here very often (hourly or quarter hourly if need be), and take it one day at a time.  Read and read.  Blog and Blog.  You have quit before, so you can do this.  The difference is that it's not a contest to see how far you can go or how long you can go without having a cigarette.  It's about living in the day and making healthy lifestyle choices.  Hope to see you around.

Regards,

Michelle

[Sootie]

My sympathy on the loss of your Mother. I TRULY know what you are going through as I lost my Mother on December 1st.

It is not just you "feeling" that way........each quit is sort of harder for a few reasons......

>You smoked for some more time again...thereby adding more smoking time on your life

>You made a choice to smoke....thereby giving yourself "permission" to smoke again

>Every day one and week one and month one make the next relapse and start over harder and harder.

Not being snarky-----just saying FROM EXPERIENCE..... I do think each time we let ourselves smoke it reinforces the smoking life.

This is NOT to say we should not try, try again. But----think about what you will do to keep from smoking if the unthinkable happens....worst case scenario

And again---my heart cries with yours over the loss of our Moms. I feel lost in the world without her and I am sure you feel the same. Peace.

Stay Strong.

[Tabbiekat]

Glad you came back, believe in yourself, you got this

Tabbie

[CommunityAdmin]

Glad you're back at it.  Check out Updating quit date on community to get your quit date updated.

Mark
EX Community Manager