on Dec 3, 2017Im am concerned. Seeing people ask for donations of money scare me a bit on here.
Anyne else seeing red flags? Especially this time of year?
I hate to be so cautious, but I have been duped before. Just sayin.....
Im am concerned. Seeing people ask for donations of money scare me a bit on here.
Anyne else seeing red flags? Especially this time of year?
I hate to be so cautious, but I have been duped before. Just sayin.....
No matter how sincere and heartfelt the plea, this is completely the wrong venue for such a request. Please report it!
I have struggled with this all day, I am worried that someone may be in serious trouble and while this may not be the right venue to ask for financial help, I would really like to think that we could find a way to offer help in other ways. Honestly, I cannot get this off my mind. My heart hurts thinking of someone who is so needy...I am sure that it was not easy to ask for help, if I am our of line, I apologize but, like I said, I cannot get this off my mind.
Ellen
It made me nervous because I did give money to someone last year about this time on a site who was very much down on their luck. I felt terrible for them and wanted to help, so I did. Long story short....it was a scam on Facebook and it was on the news about people doing this.....going to sites, joining, giving a hard luck story and staying around long enough to bait the hook. Then ask for donations.
I am sure there are many honest people who visit sites and truly are down on their luck, but how do you know anymore? I am one to ride on the side of caution and my apology if Iupset you or anyone else but posting this ‘red flag’. I think your a very warm-hearted person and I like to think I am as well. I would give the shirt off my back if someone needed one.
Helping in other ways is a good way to help them perhaps, doing research for them to find ways to help. I pray. Answers and solutions will come.
Meanwhile, I meant no offense to anyone, was just sharing my concern and posted to see if anyone else was feeling that or if I over reacted. I think I will take a break from this site for now. I am sorry ai upset you or anyone else.
xoxoMissy
No, I hope you don't take a break from this site we just got you back, we have alot of scams going on here too ,especially now with Christmas being so close and they're looking for kind hearted people just like us to scam and if they are legit, there's really no way to know for sure so it's best to direct them to a Salvation Army and or a Foodbank, I've helped before and have been burned and really can't chance being scammed, hugs Mandolinrain
I agree with you Mandolinrain - this is not the place for that. Her blog was taken down - not sure if she deleted it or if admin did. I have given money to someone that was going through a difficult time - and never received any confirmation from them that it was received or appreciated. This day and time people can pretend to be anything they want to be - and we would never know the difference. Please do not leave us over this.
elvan - I have located this person's facebook profile and she does seem to be legitimate. She has a gofundme account set up. I will give you the details by PM if you are interested.
Thanks Jennifer. It makes me feel better that she was being legitimate. But you just never know. I’m not leaving the site. I was just worried I had offended people here I care deeply for and thought I spoke out of line. I was just concerned. I’m here, you can’t be rid of me that easily.
I would NEVER want you to take a break from the site...this person sounded desperate in a way that frightened me and I wanted to do something to help her. I have contacted her via direct message and I support anyone who does not feel comfortable giving money to anyone. That said, Jennifer-Quit-05-01-14, after our house burned, there were many donations from people I did not know and there was no way that I could deal with my own grief and sending thank you notes to everyone. I wrote a letter to the editor of our local paper and I did everything I could to try to thank people...I have given to more than one GoFundMe account and I have never received any acknowledgments from the recipients. I guess I never felt like that's why I was giving...I think this person needs help and it can be in any form...directing her to resources in her area, offering emotional support, I felt something coming from that blog that frightened me. Please send me a direct message with her facebook information and the gofundme account. Thanks.
If I offended anyone with my "bleeding heart", so be it, it wouldn't be the first time and I strongly suspect that it won't be the last.
Peace,
Ellen
I am so glad this particular person was not a scammer. I do feel bad I held out a red flag and caused such a ruckus. I will be praying this person gets the help they need.
elvan, your heart is just perfect! Love you, Missy
A dear friend of mine always counsels me not to give money to people. She insists ----and rightfully so----that I give the person the telephone #'s and contact information to contact a local United Way. They will help the person get connected with local Social Service agencies in their area who can help. It may not seem like the right thing to do....but believe....it is the better way to truly solve the problem and get a person help.
Just my opinion
You have a smart friend!
I like this idea and I will store it in my brain for future use.....hope it doesnt get lost in there, lol
I've helped people on here before. the gift is in the giving. If you can't afford to give or you are suspicious, don't.
I was pleased to do it and there were never any negative repercussions. I don't think it's good to post requests in the main posts area. I don't think there's a spot for that in the site format or that they would even allow it. It's a conundrum.
Give with your heart, your head and your ability. (don't put yourself in a bad position financially to do it) :-)
Thanks for mentioning me Thomas3.20.2010 and Mandolinrain for flagging. It's a gray area. There are legitimate people out there in need and there are some that are not so legitimate. I tend to have a very easily tripped red flag. To that effect, there have been cases where it was obviously a scam and those posts have been removed. On occasion there is a legitimate need. Should you see a post like this, please flag it for my review and I'll look into it further to determine if the need is legitimate. Neither member explicitly broke any rules and their participation on the community isn't characteristic of a scammer. You should always use caution when sending funds to anyone.
Thanks for the many viewpoints. jonescarp.aka.dale.Jan_2007 it is a conundrum. When elvan was in need I imagine people here would have(and maybe did) stepped up and helped her even in a minimal way. Sootie yes local services may assist as well. It's amazing how things are available and yet some of which go unused. There are actually some services that are provided by numerous churches in my area that have been abused even with a fair amount of background checking. At least here on EX we can see someone's participation history and see if they've committed to their quit and worked to pay it forward to someone else or if they're just coming here for a handout.
I'm going to review the comments made here with the team. Thank you!
Mark
I think that this time of year is a rough one for the departments of social services, for the United Way, for all of the charitable foundations because they are trying to help so many people and their funding is at the end. There WERE people here who helped me after the fire. I never asked, I never expected it but people stepped forward and got me through the worst time I have ever experienced. I CHOOSE to pay it forward in whatever way(s) that I can. I do not judge those who choose to direct people to organizations. We all have to do what we have to do...if it is not possible for you or if you do not think it is a good idea...that's certainly your right. As I said, I felt something from this blog and I had to go with my gut. Whatever happens, happens. This person is the mother of a veteran who did two tours of duty in Iraq and who cannot get an ambulance ride to a doctor's appointment. He is allowed NO weight bearing. I suggested to her that she contact United Way, the Salvation Army, DSS, local churches...etc. She has done so and she has also been trying to work with the V.A. Today, I suggested that she contact a local TV station because I have seen many stories on stations where I live that had very positive outcomes.
Whatever the collective decision, I think we all have personal ones to make as well.
Ellen
there's also the personal message feature on this site
I used that with her and am continuing to do so. Like I said, we all have to do what we have to do and I will forever be grateful to those who stepped up and helped me. I asked her to contact me via direct message when I first saw the blog. I am seriously grateful to Jennifer-Quit-05-01-14 for her follow up and making donating a possibility. I really hope that she reaches out to local media because I think that they may be able to help.
when you see those, report them as abuse so that they're flagged for the admin