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Give and get support around quitting

Lolotte
Member

Scared two weeks in advance

I am planning on quitting. My quit day is Nov 6 and I am already anxious about it, Isn’t that crazy? I feel I am going to lose my best friend even if I know she is my worst ennemy. 

I have to do it! But I am scared. Anyone is feeling the same?

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8 Replies
JACKIE1-25-15
Member

What you are feeling is very normal.  

Welcome to EX.  We all had our fears.  The idea is to start at the beginning by making a commitment that no matter what happens or goes on in your life that you will not use it as an EXcuse to smoke.  With that philosophy you will have success on this journey.  No it is not easy but it is doable by using that principle and educating yourself about nicotine addiction.   If you hang around you will see that quitting is doable, because many of us have.  Look forward to a new day and a new way of life.  It is all up to you.  This is all about you and what you are willing to do to be smoke free. Quitting smoking requires hard work and determination not to give up.   It can be challenging at times but you will learn that it is doable if you adhere to NOPE not one puff ever no matter what. Start first, by educating yourself about nicotine addiction.  Education is the key to a successful quit.  Read: Freedom from Nicotine My Journey Home and Nicotine Addiction 101         

Here are the links: http://whyquit.com/whyquit/LinksAAddiction.html   and http://whyquit.com/ffn/

I also encourage you to read. Allen Carr’s book, “Easy Easier Way to Quit Smoking”.       

The link is here:  http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

 Go to http://www.becomeanex.org/how-to-quit-smoking.php#thl and get started. 

maryfreecig
Member

Yep, I smoked for decades and I didn't trust myself to quit, but with each day bringing me closer to quitting, I worked and planned the harder...mostly fleshing out an approach as to how I would react to urges and upset feelings. I watched videos that emphasized healthy thinking about quitting, that were empathetic and I avoided (quick and easy ideas as if the magic comes outside of oneself). I looked high and low for reason and motivation, saved all my used butts in a jar so as to keep looking at the reality of smoking...

Keep challenging yourself to face your quit, fear and all. You do not have to be super strong to quit, but dig deep for the quit you already are hoping to have. Yes you can quit one day at a time.

Tabbiekat
Member

My quit date is the 30th, just looked and exactly two weeks from today. I have had the roller coaster emotions since my husband decided to quit on the 30th-His final one being on the way to the hospital. I am allowing myself to smoke during/after, but after I leave the hospital for the night I will be stopping at the car wash and if so desire will have my last one while on the way. I was excited when he said yes to quitting because for the last few years I always said when you want to quit, I will quit with you, otherwise 30 days after you die (he is 21 yrs older so it will probably happen). A few days after he said he was going to quit I told him no matter what I am done, saw my doctor, got prescribed Chantix, joined this group, but a couple of days ago (when I started the Chantix) I got really anxious about quitting, having second thoughts, said to myself "well maybe if he starts again I will" then I had a good stern talk with myself. I know it will be a loss of a very long time bad friend, but it will still be strange for awhile. I found reading lots of posts here has helped, as well as making plans for known triggers and I know that I will be prepared to the best of my ability for my quit so I can once and for all say goodbye to a very bad friend, that truly is not and never was a friend.

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JACKIE1-25-15
Member

Losing a BAD friend is a good thing. Congratulations on your decision to quit smoking and educating yourself about nicotine addiction.  Stay close. The journey continues. 

elvan
Member

Your quit will get EASIER as you get underway and you add days and go through different experiences and you realize that you CAN do it, that you can get past one day at a time.  I didn't have a quit date...I got sick, the decision was made FOR me.  I couldn't smoke, I couldn't even breathe.  It was a terrifying experience and because I have COPD, I am constantly reminded of what smoking did to me, what I ALLOWED it to do to me.  I have been smoke free for over three years and eight months...I don't think anyone ever believed I would be able to quit, except my youngest daughter who told me that she always KNEW I could and would do it.  What beautiful words to hear from someone you love so much.

Welcome to EX, stay close by, read and read...everything you can find about nicotine addiction and read blogs, see how others are getting through the happenings in THEIR lives, see how they are actually getting stronger and stronger and growing in more ways than you can imagine.  Our emotional growth is a wonderful side effect of quitting.  We learn to deal with life the same way as people who were never addicted ALWAYS dealt with life...by not stuffing our feelings into cigarettes.

Ellen

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YoungAtHeart
Member

Welcome to our community!

There is a wonderful group of people here willing to be your substitute friend during this journey - and ones who won't slowly steal your health and your money!  Most of us were anxious - it's natural to do so when facing the unknown territory.  If you have smoked for years, you probably can't imagine how your life will be without them.  I am here to promise you that your life will be AMAZING - really!  Educating yourself about this addiction will allay a LOT of your fears.

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I also  highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read.

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested in My Quit Plan http://www.becomeanex.org/my-quit-plan.php

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

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GinaK
Member

I'm quitting on November 1st, and I know exactly the fear/anxiety you are feeling.  I mean, talking about quitting is one thing; actually making a commitment to do it and seeing my quit date getting closer has a finality about it.  And then all the fears pop into my head "I've tried to quit before and failed, so what makes me think I can do it this time?"  "How am I going to cope with this situation (fill in the blank) without a cigarette?"  "I really enjoy smoking (at least some of the time). I'm going to miss it."  "You mean I can never have a cigarette again, or ever again know the comforting, familiar feeling in my lungs--ever???!"  I've had these thoughts when I've tried to quit in the past, and I'm having them this time, too.  But THIS time I'm trying to read all I can about this addiction.  Yes, I'm anxious and, honestly, a bit scared.  But I'm doing what I can to be successful this time.  We can do this!!!

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elvan
Member

GinaK‌ That is your addiction talking to you, trying to keep you under control...it will say anything to convince you that you need to smoke, you will get stronger and stronger as you read, please stay close to the site because you will learn from people who are going through exactly the same thing or who have been exactly where you are.  The support here is amazing.

Ellen