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Give and get support around quitting

emostruggle
Member

Music

I am very inspired by music.  I have been constantly listening to the Unleashed album by Skillet.  I was just wondering if music helps anyone else and what you listen to?

9 Replies
YoungAtHeart
Member

I'm not a big music fan - but I love to dance to it! I raised two girls on my own, and the "sound of silence" is something I think I now cherish more than most anything else.   Dancing or singing to music releases dopamine - the chemical you miss when you quit smoking.  Not sure about listening - but if it improves your mood - what's not to love about it?

I notice you haven't blogged since April....did you quit?  Hope so!  If not, how can we help?

Nancy

emostruggle
Member

Hi! Unfortunately I have "quit" everyday for the past 4 months... I have been so upset with myself I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone about my everyday failures.  But I am determined to do this and today is the first day of the rest of my life. My biggest problem is I am focused and determined, but I let that slip and it turns into the demon in my head saying yeah yeah you can do it later. But I have decided that I not only need to but I have to do this.

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YoungAtHeart
Member

I notice from reading your earlier blogs that somehow you missed my usual welcome.  I will post if for you now.  It won't hurt, if you have already done some of the reading, to do it AGAIN!  Education, planning, preparation and commitment are the essential parts of a successful quit!  Einstein's definition of insanity comes to mind:  it is "doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result."  You will need to come up with your own plan, one that will work for YOU ---- but they all have one thing in common.  You must decide you will not smoke another cigarette NO MATTER WHAT.  When that voice starts in on you, change your mind's direction.  Snap a rubber band around your wrist, listen to some DIFFERENT music, name the red/blue/white things in the room.

Here is my usual welcome message:

The most important thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on what nicotine does to your body and mind. To that end, I highly recommend Allen Carr's “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking.” This is an easy and entertaining read. Here is a link to a free PDF version of it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/74fa87_2010cc5496521431188f905b7234a829.pdf

 You should also read the posts here and perhaps go to the pages of folks who you think might be helpful. You might visit whyquit.com, quitsmokingonline.com and livewell.com for the good information contained there. @https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/groups/best-of-ex has lots of blogs written by members of this site with their experiences and guidance. You should also do the tracking and separation exercises suggested in My Quit Plan http://www.becomeanex.org/my-quit-plan.php

After you have completed the recommended reading, it will be time to make an informed choice of the quit aid, if any, you will use. If you go that route, I personally recommend the aids that don't let the addict control the dose such as the available prescription drugs or the patch. If used properly, gum, lozenges and inhalers are fine, but they need to be used only as a last resort.  I have seen folks become addicted to them if they substitute them for every cigarette they used to smoke - just trading one addiction for another.  I do not recommend the e-cigarette for three reasons: 1) the vapor has been compared to the polluted air in Bejing on a bad day, 2) they just provide another nicotine delivery system while continuing the hand to mouth smoking motion, and 3) the batteries can spontaneously catch on fire. . But – any method that you think will work well for you will be best for you.

The idea is to change up your routines so the smoking associations are reduced.  Drink your coffee with your OTHER hand. If you always had that first smoke with your coffee, try putting your tennies on right out of bed, going for a quick walk, then taking your shower and THEN your coffee! Rearrange the furniture in the areas you used to smoke so the view is different. Buy your gas at a different station. Take a different route to work. Take a quick walk at break time where the smokers AREN'T.

You need to distract yourself through any craves.  You can take a bite out of a lemon (yup - rind and all), put your head in the freezer and take a deep breath of cold air, do a few jumping jacks, go for a brisk walk or march in place, play a computer game.  Don't let that smoking thought rattle around in your brain unchallenged. Sometimes you need to quit a minute or an hour at a time.  You will need to be disciplined in the early days to distract yourself when a crave hits.    Get busy!  Here is a link to a list of things to do instead of smoke if you need some fresh ideas:

https://excommunity.becomeanex.org/blogs/Youngatheart.7.4.12-blog/2013/02/25/100-things-to-do-instea...

The conversation in your head in response to the "I want a cigarette" thought needs to be, "Well, since I have decided not to do that anymore, what shall I do instead for the three minutes this crave will last?"  Then DO it.  You will need to put some effort into this in the early days, but it gets easier and easier to do.

Stay close to us here and ask questions when you have them and for support when you need it. We will be with you every step of the way!

Nancy

Giulia
Member

Howdy!  As Nancy said, music and dancing to it releases dopamine.  That's a pretty bad@ss  group you listen to.  Kind of angry, perhaps?  I can see being furious at those cravings and dancing them away to that music for sure!  Blast them into the past!  Be Invincible in your commitment and unleash the power of your I CAN!  (I'm the complete opposite in music tastes - like the real soothing stuff.  Different strokes for different folks!)  

That demon in your head is simply the addiction talkin' at you.  The way to help shut it up is be re-focusing and reframing the thought process.  You reframe your thoughts through educating yourself about this addiction but more importantly educating yourself about yourself.  Asking yourself some intense questions and being brutally honest in your answer.  You may think you're focused and determined, but are you really?  We talk of "acceptance" a lot here.  Accepting the journey.  Have you perhaps not yet accepted it?  What is it about discomfort that you are unwilling to go through?  What fears do you have about letting go of smoking?  What do you THINK will happen when you quit?  What kind of plans and preparations have you made to help yourself along the journey?  What are you willing to do to ensure your success at this?  So many questions one can ask as they go through this process.  It's part of the homework every successful, long-term quitter does.  Keep aiming for the Gold!

emostruggle
Member

Wow, those are some deep questions.  I'm sure I have asked myself them before but don't know how honest I really was about the answer.  I have read The Easy Way To Quit Smoking twice and think I understand it but then when I put out my "last cigarette" and tell myself its the last one I automatically go to the way of thinking "is it really..."  I know that is completely counter productive but it runs through my head before I have a chance to negate it.  I think one of my biggest problems is completely accepting the journey. I guess I don't know how to fully accept my decision.  One thing I realized is everyday when I say its my last one I don't tell anyone because that would make it to "REAL" if that makes any sense.  Thank you for the insight, I need to look further into myself and make this commitment real!

Mandolinrain
Member

Love music...most all kinds from classical to Rap( some of it ), have to say classical folk and bluegrass are my favorites. But then again, I love James Taylor, Carole King, Steely Dan, Eagles, Pure Praire League...Fleetwood Mac, Eagles, Rod Stewart,....I could go on forever........

Anyway, do the suggested reading above. Knowledge is power and the key to a successful quit .  Come here and read read read. LISTEN to the music, its everywhere my friend:)

elvan
Member

Welcome to EX, I have not been around much the last couple of days...PLEASE do the reading that has been suggested, not just Allen Carr but the personal journeys of those who are here.  I tend to listen to "Classic Vinyl" on Sirius Radio in my car...I love Queen, Pink Floyd, Rod Stewart, and there are many country artists I also greatly appreciate.  Music is soothing to the soul and the soul of a recovering addict needs a LOT of soothing.  It gets better but you have to be willing to go through the journey...one day at a time.

Ellen

bonniebee
Member

I Love music !!!! It has gotten me through so many good and bad times in my life ! Sometimes as Jim Morrison of the Doors once said I felt it was my only friend !............ Not really but in fleeting moments !

I love some of all of  these I love  the 60's , I  love the 70's, I love the 80's, I love the 90's , I love the 2000's , I love the 2010"s !!! I love some of all of these decades I have so many favorites that it is hard to choose which ones to mention so just a very few Pink Floyd .... A Classic !  U2 ,Counting Crows,Pearl Jam   the 10 album, STP , Soundgarden  RIP Chris Cornell, One of my very favorites now is Coldplay  I love Adele, Beth Hart ,Michael Kiwanuka , LP  she is a great singer ...see I could go on and on ! I have not heard Skillet but by there name they must be one hot band ! I will look for them on You tube  I also like some classical, some Bluegrass and some Irish and I like  a lot of Folk . I even have a playlist of movie theme songs that I love. 

Music helped me quit smoking I like to walk and listen to music both helped me very much .  sorry to go on and on but i do love music !

You got a lot of quitting advice above and i would pay a lot of attention to what Giulia and YoungAtHeart said above They are two awesome ladies that have helped me get to 939 days of freedom !sayings welcome we are glad you are here.jpgJust thought of something You said, this thought goes through your head when you think this is your last one "Is it really ?" That is okay  !!! You cannot just stop a thought but you can change a thought ! As soon as you hear it just say to yourself "I don't do that anymore or any number of positive remarks  you will be surprised at how much that will help Attitude has so much to do with success it took me a long time to realize that and I learned it here on Ex by so many good people who have helped me on this journey .

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