When I looked at the calendar, I realized my 50-day smokefree mark fell on Christmas Day. I've been trying to use that as an encouragement, along with praying. People tell me that it gets easier with time, but I've been having a heck of a bad time these past couple of days. It has hit me like a ton of bricks and at times I've found myself shaking like an earthquake over the "want to smoke or not". I cannot stand it. I had been doing pretty well. I really do not understand it when newbies say that they are doing wonderfully or excellent. It's closing in on 7 weeks for me and BANG!!! I will admit that watching my neighbor, my friend, outside puffing her brains out is suddenly enticing to me. And, I do enjoy being in stores when someone comes up behind me that smells of that foul stench. This is a deterent for me. So, then why am I on the 'brink'???