Thanks everyone. It was a really hard day today. After having jumped the gun and quit early, somehow I began to feel that I had deprived myself of something. I reminded myself of something that my friend heard in a smoking cessation class. You don't want just one cigarette, you want a lifetime of cigarettes.
It was a very discouraging day at school and on my way home I was feeling like I had been beat up. I stopped at the store to get my quit aid because with my crazy schedule, I hadn't had time yet. I was tired and cranky and hungry and I had to remind myself that smoking would not take any of those feelings away. Once I got home I realized there was one sneaky cigarette hiding in an empty pack in my purse. If I hadn't bought that $40 pack of gum on the way home I probably would have smoked that cigarette. Instead, I got rid of it, but I kept thinking about cigarettes so I went for a walk. Of course, a man walked by me with a lit cigarette. I wondered if this is an unusual occurrance or if I just noticed it more now and for the life of me I can't figure out which it is. I'm not the type to smoke while I walk. One always interferes with the other. And thankfully, I never quite got the hang of smoking and driving so I am pretty safe in the car. I realized that ever since I left school at about 2:30, I have been in one way or another thinking about cigarettes. Now that I have finished rambling, I must move on to something completely different.
