Slept much better last night. Took the patch off just before crawling into bed. Took a few minutes to settle down but boy did I sleep! Woke up a little earlier than usual. I put my new patch on, let the dog out, then did my 5 minute guided relaxation videos. Stress lasted about an hour and not as intense. After my shower, I feel call and ready to start my day. No frantic what can I do now to stay busy, even with having gotten up earlier.
I felt more angry this morning. Angry at myself for causing this. Why the hell did I start smoking in the first place? To look cool? Mature? What I am going through doesn't feel cool. What I've put my son through doesn't feel cool. I know I cannot change the past and I do not want to dwell in regrets. What is done is done and I am taking steps to change it now. I know I can not rush the process either. It took a long time to get here, it won't go away in a week. Hopefully each day will continue to get better.