It's been a while since I posted my last blog, but a lot happened. Let's just say I've overcome a sad period of my life during which, against all odds, I didn't feel the need to smoke whatsoever. Everyone who experienced what I experienced wants to do all the things they weren't able to do until they recovered: I left everything and booked one round trip flight to Sardinia and one to Barcelona, not fearing the loneliness I could've felt during my trips. They were some of the best experiences I've ever lived in my whole life: the sense of freedom I felt is unexplainable. But...
Although I hadn't felt the need to smoke until then (I could say I'd almost forgotten it) a huge desire hit me real hard right when I started being happier.
I had already decided I would go back to smoking. Fortunately I got lucid thanks to my girlfriend (she's really important to me in my quit journey) and I got back on track.
I had read somewhere that we need to make one complete year pass before we can consider ourselves "healed", that is debatable but does have some truth inside: a year is the time it takes for us to experience almost all the common events that occur in our life, i.e. holidays, travels, arguments, stress, etc... ALMOST!
It had been a lot of time since I had lived a strong experience such as traveling alone, and that precise freedom feeling was about to get me a prisoner: it whispered to me that it would feel even better, much better with a cigarette. That single idea was about to toss my fifteen-months work in the trash. Smoking a cigarette felt worth losing my fifteen-months work, can you imagine?
When you feel tempted, even after a long quit, think about the fact that your brain has to unlearn what it has learnt. Think about the fact that it can't make it without experiencing ALL the situations that got you to smoke.
Next time I'm on vacation I won't feel the same desire, 'cause my brain added one more brick to my quit-building.
