I am at work. It’s 10pm. I don’t know how long I’ll be here. I have to be back at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Needless to say my sleep routine is going to be disrupted tonight. I avoid this because it’s a trigger, thinking I have to stay up all night to make it work the next day. I am doing what I hate, documentation. Writing makes me extremely nervous. It’s the most triggering activity I can think of. I will not smoke. I came here to tell on my disease. I’m playing it safe. In the past, I’d think, “I can handle it”. Today I am practicing what worked from Day 1: coming to the site everyday and checking in if I feel like I am tempted to smoke.
