I stopped participating in the community because I relapsed. I have been a member long enough that you probably already guessed that. I need to admit
to the community that I relapsed so I feel comfortable coming here again for help.
I felt hopeless after relapsing. I thought I did not have any reservations. I was wrong. I put my new job ahead of everything. I justified not using the community for support. I thought I could handle it. The stress got to me. Because I stopped doing the things that kept me smoke-free, I eventually gave into the urge to smoke. I couldn’t handle the cravings anymore on my own. I shouldn’t have been trying to deal with my addiction alone anyway.
Now I am more balanced. I set boundaries with myself on how much I work. I take breaks. It’s not negotiable. I have to put my recovery from addiction above work or I won’t be able to work. I’ll be sick or dead.
i have stopped smoking for the time being. I am on the patch. I have reached out to my 12-Step sponsor who is also an ex-smoker. I reached out to a member of my 12-Step home group. I have identified other people I can reach out to if I get the obsession to smoke.
My involvement here will be minimal from here on out. Local support and applying the 12 Steps to smoking is what works best for me, so I am putting my energy into building and using local support. I have learned a lot from this site. It has helped me stop smoking several times. But I have not been able to stop the cycle of relapse, so obviously, I need to do more than just participate in the becomeanex community.