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Share your quitting journey

I’m worth it

mstabler
Member
1 8 67

I’ve really not been kind to my body in the last year. I’ve not given myself enough good food, good sleep, or good habits. I’ve been filling my body with fat and sugar and processed food for their immediate gratification and I’ve been self-medicating with alcohol and cigarettes. I just have not honored myself and my life as I should. In doing so, I think I’ve also been less of a mother, wife, friend, and teacher than I could be. I’m selling myself and my potential short by doing all these things. I know I have great potential to impact this world positively and I know that God has created me for a purpose. I’m so blessed in this life. I have my health, a wonderful husband (and best buddy), awesome friends, and incredible colleagues (and best buddies). I’ve also been blessed with beauty and intelligence and an open, honest heart. Unfortunately, I’ve really been taking those gifts for granted by treating myself so carelessly. I’m deciding to quit smoking. My quit day is Monday April 22. I know that’s only two days away, but I’ve been ready to quit a long time; I’ve just been too scared. I’m scared that I won’t be able to and I’ll end up smoking again, damaging my physical and mental health. If that happens, I know I’ll be so discouraged and defeated and disappointed in myself. That mean voice in my head will try to convince me that I’m weak and stupid and deserve the toxic poison sucked through that cigarette. But I have to accept the fear as a normal emotion in this quitting journey. I have to allow myself to feel scared, recognize it as part of the journey and keep walking, one day at a time, one step at a time, and one breath at a time — one deep, clean, healthy breath at a time. Here I go!!!! I’m worth it.

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About the Author
I’m a high school teacher, wife, and mother of two. I’m 44 years old and love laughing, reading, writing, napping, being with my girlfriends, traveling, talking with my husband and best friend. I also love learning: anything, everything, and from everyone. I also struggle with depression and anxiety, but I find that exercise and social interaction (plus Zoloft) help me overcome it.