Tomorrow is my Quit Date
I am 64 years old and it took me 44 years to get here.
All my life I have been very active. Last summer it hit me and knew I had some lung damage as I could not bike for hours like I used to. Two or three sinus infections during the summer and November was in the hospital for 2 days with pneumonia. From a scan showed mild COPD in my left lung.
In the big scheme of things my health is very good. Certainly aware that it is deteriorating as I do not have the energy I used to. It is not from getting older as I liked to keep telling myself. I can no longer be in denial that it is the cigarettes.
I admit it as well that I am a vain woman and am not liking these smoking induced wrinkles around my lips either.
The past couple of years I have done nothing but beat myself up over quitting for 1 or 2 days, failing and trying again. I am exhausted with the mental games I have been playing with myself
Life has been and always will be difficult. Just a matter how difficult I want to make it. I certainly can be my own worst enemy.
These last two weeks you all have given me faith and belief in myself that I can do this.
NOPE there is no reason for me to smoke again
I just do not do that anymore
Singing a new song in my head
Keep me honest, positive, grateful and humble
