Day 10!

[jbennett300]

I think Day 7 was the worst for me. I was so irritable and wondering when it would be less "painful". I kept reading about the magical number, 72. The hour that nicotine will be out of the body and cravings will be less intense. Or the magical number 48. The hour when anger will happen less often. And I decided I needed to stop looking at these numbers, since they were making me feel bad about myself. Why didn't I conform to these statistics? Why is it taking me longer to reach the "less irritable" stage? Why am I more and more irritable each day? 

Because it is what it is. This is my experience, and I need to go through it and be curious about the changes rather than focus on why I'm missing what others got to experience. I'm not weaker than other people. Other people aren't better than I am. I do not need to be jealous of other people. I do need to stop comparing myself to other people.

And then at some point on day 8, I was mindful that I wasn't craving for hours at a time. My cravings only lasted a couple minutes, and in between, I was able to concentrate on work for longer periods of time. This is fantastic! But I don't want to get too excited. This is a process, and I've gotten over a difficult hurdle, but challenges still await. And I'm ready for them.