ctm

Thoughts of Smoking…

Blog Post created by ctm on Jan 29, 2009

This is mostly a question for longer term (several months or more) quitters but anyone is welcome to comment.

What I have personally experienced and the consensus that I've found is that longer term quitters do not get "craves" but we do have "thoughts of smoking".

I'll use the following analogy to describe my current personal state:

A "thought of smoking" is kind of like a ladybug landing on my arm.

The vast majority of time, I'm in an auto-pilot mode and if I see the bug about to land, it is swooshed away immediately without ever allowing the thought to enter my mind.

Once in a great while, the ladybug actually lands, but I'm still in complete control. I have 2 basic options at this point:

1. Flick away the bug and be done with it.
2. Fixate on it.

I always choose option 1 without a moment's hesitation.

Once in an even greater while, some stupid first time trigger or whatever happens that causes me to have to conscientiously pay attention. When this happens, it isn't so much a desire to smoke as much as it is actively making sure that I don't do something stupid. An example might be to go out to dinner, have 1 glass of wine too many and then "accidentally bum" a cigarette off someone in front of the restaurant without thinking.

I haven't seriously thought of buying a pack, packing it down, removing the cellophane, opening the box, removing the foil, taking out the cigarette, putting it in my mouth, lighting it, and sucking in the poison for longer than I can remember.

The closest I've come was several weeks ago, under stress, I was at a convenience store and thought that it would have been easy to buy a pack. It was just about as easy to not buy the pack and stay the course on my quit.

My question is:

What is a "thought of smoking"?

In some ways, I "think" of smoking every time I see someone smoke. But it's not, "I want one". It's the same thing as watching someone eat a cheeseburger!

In a sense, each time I use this site, I "think" of smoking. Again, it's not, "I want one". More like thinking about why I don't want one.

I can't even remember the last time I truly wished to be puffing away on a lit cigarette!

I am curious to know what are your "thoughts of smoking"?

Thanks in advance for your feedback and have a wonderful smoke-free evening@

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