My day

Blog Post created by constanceclum on Aug 6, 2019

Today has just been mild cravings off and on. I have not had a lozenge so I believe it's time to give those up and just use regular mints in place of. I went back to the AA meeting at noon and, when it was over, exited to the porch where people were chatting and some were smoking. I use to be 1 of those smokers. Yesterday I blogged that it set off a huge craving for me that took hours to get over. Today it lost it's power. I'm choosing not to hang around, I'm not ready for that. But walking through and smelling the smoke did cause a mild craving that quickly went away.


One thing that is different with this quit is, from the start, even through the really tough days, when a smoking thought enters my brain, I refuse to dwell on it or allow it to become a deep thought. I have not had a "just 1" thought. As soon as the thought enters my brain, I make it exit as I move on to something else. In the past, I would dwell on the thought of how bad I felt during really tough craves and I would start to feel sorry for myself. That leads to the "just 1 thought. Then the mental battle begins and then my resolve and NOPE.


And I have a lot of periods of sadness. Dealing with these health issues and knowing I caused them. And 1 of my adult sons has been going through a horrible time the past couple of months, and I am so sad for him and all that he is going through. Why, when our adult children are hurting, do they become 5 again. I also had to quit (I won't go into reasons here) my bipolar depression med. a couple of mo. ago without a replacement.  I go back to the Dr. in 1&1/2 weeks to evaluate. I'm telling you all this, especially the newcomers, that I am doing this in spite of. That life doesn't stop because we choose to quit smoking but, one think I learned here is, smoking will not help anything and, in fact, makes things worse.


God bless,