I wanted a cigarette.....

Blog Post created by Youngatheart.7.4.12 on Nov 7, 2017

just for a moment.  I wanted that hit of dopamine, and the feeling of "all is well" that goes with it.  I am feeling quite miserable today.  I can't do most of what I want or need to do.  I have an infected gum and sinuses, a swollen face, an upset stomach from the antibiotics, the hip on my GOOD leg is throbbing, as is the bad knee. 

But - I know better.  BUT - I understand now how easy that would be to happen.  I actually feel too awful to go to the store - but even if I didn't, I am sure I wouldn't do that.  I understood all too well that "just one" isn't possible.

But - just for a moment, I wished it wasn't so!