I am up at 2 am in the night and thinking about my quit journey so far. It's just 8 days so far, I see so many warriors here, much ahead in the quit curve, and that gives me the courage and strength to think that it's possible for me too.
I am not sure If a Discussion was the right place to put this, but I just wanted to write down my thoughts and share what's happening.
I didn't start with a quit plan, I just quit abruptly. It was difficult to find cigarettes during lock-down anyways, so I decided not to search for one after my last pack was over. In my head, I was happy with this situation and excited to give quitting a try. After I didn't smoke for 1 day at stretch, i decided to plan my quit journey. Coming to this wonderful 'Ex Community' was part of that planning.
Last days have been fine. Now that i am not smoking, i am slowly able to see what cravings i have, the strong ones, the weak ones and the times when i just smoked out of habit. For me, the moment i get up in the morning, thats the strongest craving. When i do something productive, thats another strong craving. When i am mentally stimulated and excited and my thoughts are flowing positively, thats another strong craving. And when i am tired and exhausted, thats a strong craving as well. Maybe i will identify more along the way.
I was going through some physical and psychological effects which i didn't knew were the withdrawal symptoms till i read about them today. I am finding it difficult sleeping at night, a dry mouth, sweating at night, and occasional dizziness. I am also finding it hard to concentrate. Its like my mind is clogged. And it feels like the mind is Clogged FOREVER and the only solution to that would be to smoke one cigarette and unclog it. I hope thats not true.
Honestly speaking, with all the withdrawal symptoms, i am really fine with this quitting experience so far. Infact i am feeling great right now. But there is a catch in this feeling. The reason i am fine is because i know i can't have a cig at the moment anyways due to the lockdown. This feeling would change as soon as cigs are available easily in the market and i would have to fight with myself every moment of the day to not buy the next pack and smoke. And this struggle of the future scares me.
Anyways, I am not sure why I wrote this and if someone is even going to read this, but i just thought i would share:) Please reply back if someone read this.
PS: I have been a smoker for around 8 years now. And i was smoking around 10-15 cigs a day before i quit 8 days back.