53 Days of Freedom but Who’s Counting?

Blog Post created by TurboRose on Aug 23, 2017

The first 30 days being an EX were relatively smooth.  I didn’t have a pattern of smoking in my car and I didn’t smoke in the house.  I smoked on the front porch, while taking the dog out and once upon a time I smoked in the garage.  My pattern was smoking before I left home, when I returned home, when I was at work and when I was bored at home.

I didn’t make any changes in how I spent my time at home. I was still on the couch watching TV, thinking about what I could or should do and usually only doing what needed to be done.  The only thing that was different was I wasn’t smoking, drinking and self-medicating  to pass the time.  Occasionally I checked the Ex site.  I didn’t find all of the references to smoking a distraction from smoking.  I knew it was there whenever I needed support.


I knew the time would come when it would be best to make some lifestyle changes. I still sat around watching TV as I mentally made a list of the things I could do to change my pattern.  The days rolled by.  Before I knew it I was 42 days smoke free.  Yippee!


I decided to take a road trip to visit a cousin and watch the eclipse.  It would be my first road trip and visit as an Ex-smoker.  I had some concerns but I really needed a nice long drive.  The drive and the visit triggered me more than I anticipated.  I didn’t smoke but I shoveled a whole lot of food in my mouth, especially while driving.  I noticed more thoughts of smoking drifting through my mind.  The thoughts centered more on the absence of smoking. I believe these thoughts were triggered because I was experiencing 2 firsts.  I never felt my Quit was in jeopardy.  Driving home, I knew I needed to make some changes at home or it could become increasingly more challenging to remain an Ex-smoker.


Today is my first day back home.  Just watching TV wasn’t cutting it.  Earlier, I felt restless. I kept walking around looking for something to do and not wanting to do any of the options before me.  Overcoming the pattern of doing nothing but watching TV, drinking, smoking and who knows what, is the challenge I need to hurdle.  The drinking and smoking are being handled. It's the third side of the triangle that needs to be addressed. I decided to distract myself with writing and playing computer card games. I've been working on this post and playing for a few hours.  Talk about dragging something out.  I’ve jumped on the mini-trampoline a couple times.  I set a goal of 6 5 minute intervals.  I wonder how I’ll spend the rest of the day.