I've been through a lot of depressions in my past but this one was different. I can only guess what brought it on but the truth is it was a change in my brain chemistry - simple as that!
What it felt like was being thrown into a washing machine full of mud! There were literally times when I thought I couldn't breathe! There was no escaping the muck and the harder I struggled to get out the more it tumbled around me!
The only thing that really helped was to let go as contradictory to instinct as that sounds! Just accept and let go! Scary!
It's one of the skills I learned from Smoking Cessation. Sometimes you just have to ride the wave - or the mud - or whatever Life brings you! The bad doesn't last even when at the time it feels like it will last forever! What springs eternal is Hope!
When you feel that you just can't take it any more without a Sickerette just remember that on the other side of through is this magical, mystical, incredible World of FREEDOM! You can't see it, you can't even imagine it the way it really is but it's there - waiting just for you!
Ask anybody who has Quit Smoking for more than a few Months - they may not be able to put it in words but they know what I'm talking about -