Just kind of checking in. I have been reading but not really posting and such. Yesterday was a particular difficult day and I'm not certain why. Though my frustration with nothing being level or plumb in the house while trying to hang drywall surely had a large part in it. My husband still smokes but has been smoking outside and keeping it out of my sight in his effort to support me. Then yesterday he surprised me and I also surprised myself at one point.
I said out loud a few times that I needed a smoke and he reminded me that I didn't really want one. Then at one very frustrating point of the day instead of saying I need a smoke I said I need nicotine and took a lozenge. That seemed to work but I was proud of myself for replacing the smoke word with what I was truly addicted to, nicotine. I kind of reinforced what I already know. I'm a nicotine addict.
Then later in the kitchen when I was feeling kind of anxious and not sure why, my husband just out of the blue said "Thank you for not smoking" the anxiety went away, replaced with surprise and a bit of a smile. I am still surprised at how that one sentence affected me in such a positive way.
So to everyone out there, no matter how many or few days you have under your belt. From the bottom of my heart.
Thank you for not smoking.
I would also like to thank you for caring enough about yourself and others for walking down this difficult path toward a healthier life. Thank you for sharing in your wisdom, knowledge and experience. Thank you for holding out your hand when one of us is about to stumble.