Another Day Done

Blog Post created by SoosannahK on Sep 1, 2018

So I survived my first day at work, smoke-free. Of course there was temptation. Two offers to join a previous smoking buddy, I declined both offers proudly boasting my smoke free status. It was nice to not go out in the heat to get my fix. Instead of spending my lunch break chain smoking, I went to our relaxation room and sat in the massage chair and dozed a little. Today was a crazy busy day in the ER where nothing seemed to be going right. But I survived and I am home now. 


The swelling in my feet is better. Still a little puffy after working 12 hrs, but much better than yesterday. The up and moving about helped a lot today. I can finally see the bones and veins in my feet. Haven't seen those in days. And they feel so much better. 


Now my weight is concerning me. I am already overweight.  I can't stop shoving junk in my mouth. Monday is grocery day here, so hopefully some time tomorrow I can sit and meal plan and make out my list that includes healthier options than candy and Cheetos.  We are going to have to stop bringing the junk into the house and goodness knows if I can resist a cigarette, I can resist some junk food. It's getting ridiculous. I feel like I have traded one addiction for another. I know some of it is bloating, but I am quite sure I have put on a pound or five over the past week and a half.  I have braces, I wonder if I can just zip tie them together to keep my mouth closed for awhile. May consult my orthodontist about that one.


After tonight I get to join the Double Digit Club, 10 days smoke-free. A little secret, in my quits before I would have cheated by now. But I can say this time I am cheat free. I have been tempted, I have had thoughts, but that Day One still sticks firmly in my mind and the guilt of the nasty things I said to my husband. I don't want to go back there and I am just thankful I have a forgiving husband. I was not a pleasant person to him that day. My mood seems to have leveled off and I find my fuse to be a bit longer now. I still get irritated but I find I am better able to control it and my tongue. And most people irritated me when I was smoking, truth be told. 


Tomorrow I will get up and do it all over again working toward day 11. It has mostly been easier than I thought, no cake walk by any means, but not as hard as I initially thought. I am starting to have the dizziness (so much fresh oxygen to the brain, it can't stand it!!) and some sleeping issues. I have developed what I like to call the "Quit Farts". Those are quite obnoxious and I hope they pass quickly. So far I haven't embarrassed myself with those. Overall I am feeling good, I notice I am not as winded anymore. My morning wake-up cough is gone. And now I need to channel this energy and get my eating cleaned up and I will be golden. 


Hope everyone has a nice long Labor Day weekend. One more day of work for me and I am off til next weekend.