Today is my third day free from smoking. I feel great. I feel proud. And for the first time in my life I feel really confident in myself, almost like I know I deserve the gift I've been given. It's quite emotional. Having some little tears of joy over here.
Last night my husband and I were playing a few games of chess. He got up to smoke (in the kitchen with the window open and fan on full blast). It was his first in three hours. He looked me in the eye and said, "Thanks to you quitting I'm also smoking less". It made me feel really good to be a positive influence on someone. Again, this is a first.
I know I am so very very far from being out of the woods yet, but I also think this quit is THE quit. And I think so because it feels right, unlike all my prior attempts.
For the first time I'm starting to think of myself not as "a smoker", as if that were some tough girl badge of honor, but as a person. Just a person. And THAT has me feeling whole.