I'm going to use this as a tool to document what is going on in my head. Sometimes I'll write everything at once and others I'll enter one thought...go away...and then another thought. No plan - just randomness.
9:03 a.m. Today is the day. I'm sick of:
- spending money on smoking
- looking for my lighter
- sticking cigs and lighters down my top (so I don't lose them)
- smelling like that
- having my mouth taste like this
- wondering if I have cancer
- having to go outside in the heat, rain, and cold
I listened to a hypnotist as I was falling asleep last night. I woke up and didn't *need* a smoke. I smoked but just out of habit and I knew it. I have one smoke left in my purse.
Today I'm picking up Chantix. I have a list of other tools:
- pick up chantix
- call about acupunture
- read/post here
- read/listen to things about not smoking on the web
It just occurred to me that I should smoke. It's not a gut-wrenching craving but more of a thought. Yeah you should smoke now type of thing. What was going through my head was that I should go through my emails at work. Procrastination, party of one? Yup. Here we go.
I may as well just quit today.