Rough Morning

[MichelleDiane]

I was hoping that after a good nights sleep I would feel physically better as well as emotionally and mentally.  Sadly, this was not the case.  After much internal debate I decided to continue my use of the patch even though I took it off yesterday afternoon and was not too troubled by not having it on.  Actually, I got home from work, didn't eat dinner, and was sleeping by 8:30pm.  I woke one time during the night, but fell back asleep.  This morning I could barely open my eyes and had no enthusiasm at all to get started on my day.  That is not like me.  I ended the conflict by putting the patch on.  I was still not doing great and had overwhelming urges to just throw in the towel, but I didn't.  I sat down and did 15 minutes of meditation and got dressed for work.  During my drive I started singing to the radio and soon found my mood better and the urges less.  I just finished with one of my clients and am on here because I still fee a little edgy.  I'm feeling a little more strong in my quit, but nervous because I came very close.  Thinking about starting at day one snapped me out of it to some extent.  I think I just need to accept this feeling and move through it.  I know things will get better.  Thanks for being here for me