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When the going gets tough....

MichelleDiane
Member
7 20 144

Well.  Tomorrow will be 2 weeks smoke free.  I have had some steep ups and some straight downs, no bones about it.  Today at work I needed to be tough.  Out of the blue an urge hit me.  I couldn't really do anything physical as I was with a client.  Still trying to figure out if I was triggered by something this person said, but I don't believe it was.  I just had a thought that I could go and get cigarettes after work.  Well, that didn't sit too well for the new me.  I made it through the session and realized that I was going to be going home.  When the going gets tough the tough get going.  And going is what I did.  I went straight home and dismissed my momentary lapse of sanity as a momentary lapse of sanity.  Surprisingly, I was okay.  I could have gone out at any time to get smokes, but I didn't.  My inner dialogue is beginning to go on autopilot.  I know I will need to be forever mindful, but I think my brain is getting it.  It was just a thought and then it wasn't.  Imagine that.

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