Just so you know, I am still in denial about my actual quit day. I'm using the "ostrich in the sand" approach about it again today. I intend to carry this denial through the week and weekend and re-evaluate Monday. Perhaps a successful weekend will give me the strength to face my reality.
Just so you know, I am also still SMOKE FREE. Yesterday, this day, tomorrow and for ever!
Trying to take a moment to check in on how I'm feeling. It's hard to slow down and think about it. I know that I am more "revved" up now with nervous energy w/o the nicotine. My heart races when I try to stop and think about it. My palms sweat as I try to type about it here. I have been so into distracting from the thoughts about the quit that it takes a moment to sit still and actually think about it and I don't think I like doing that particularly.
Overall, I feel good. My cravings have definitely subsided. I think less and less about smoking/vaping. It's no longer the main thought of my days. Driving is still toughest time for me-to/from work. I will NOT drink more than a couple of glasses of wine again for a while-lesson learned! I have put on some weight/pounds with snacking and for whatever reason (not sure why) I have not felt compelled to do my usual low key office yoga practice on my lunch hour. Hope to get back to at least that exercise/movement soon. Just haven't felt into it. My moods seem more stable. I'm not feeling sad/tearful as I was in the first week.
Mentally, (besides/despite the relapse) I love the feeling I have of accomplishment that I have actually done what I have done thus far with smoking/vaping. I truly wasn't sure that I could do it. I was so afraid. I feel a sense of confidence coming back. I feel a sense of strength coming back. I feel like a better person.
I hope you feel like a better person, too. Each and every one of you!!
Blessings, onward and upward...
marty DOF 18/5
