Love in relation to

[Maki]

        Love in relation to quitting smoking , my journey . What worked , what didn't , and what I discovered .

                                                                     Feel free to read , feel free not to . 

                                                       As with everything on our quit journey , your choice . 

To be aware of .. this post contains Christian content .. if that makes you uncomfortable just go on to another post . It may be more helpful for you . I tried to attach this info to the title but it wouldn't let me so it's here in bold .

                                                                                       


Note .. I believe in God although not a very good practising Christian . I try to not bring that too much here on a site where there is diversity of beliefs . I have been very conscious to put anything Christian related into a group here entitled Christian Quitters rather than in a blog but due to some circumstances I have decided to enter it in my blog but don't be alarmed , I am not out to change people's beliefs or to preach .  This post was just observation and I have no judgement . I respect each and every one here . Sometimes I come across things I share that might help certain groups in their quit and post hoping they be of help . Quitting smoking is always my intent for posting .   I may however ask for an occasional prayer or good vibes however you choose to help if my quit is ever it is at risk or a circumstance pits my quit at risk . 

I write blogs mostly  for my own healing but if they help you that is a blessing I really never deserve . You took something from it and made something work for your quit .

Anything I write will be tagged at the beginning of my post as Christian content if there is , so those who want to pass or want the opportunity to respond can . If it causes discord , it will be removed by me . It's the last thing any of my posts are posted for to cause disharmony in this wonderful and diverse group of people. We need each other .   I do not write in this context often just as it's put on my heart .

Poems or content I feel may help a fellow Ex member quit will still be put  in either the Christian quitters club or my blog . Some helped me quit and if I think or itsput on my heart they may be helpful to another,  then in my eyes worthwhile posting .  I often come across what I think might be helpful to quit and although I believe in a higher power I'm not a huge church goer but I know of several writings and poems that helped me on my journey.  Sorry for run one today .. bit tired , but want to post . 

This is written today because of a past post that inspired me to learn more about a topic often seen at quit sites and I wanted to learn more in order to help more and maybe change my own heart more to become a better person and a better helper here at Ex .

The topic appeared again today so I feel I want to share my perspective or thoughts and also my own experience . 
I often hear and see people on quit sites get upset about tough love topics as in relation to slipping . I want to share that  I needed to give myself tough love when I quit , some stubbornness as well and sometimes I needed to be shown tough love by others when I was far from on track or I would have found many excuses to smoke . I am a very sensitive person ... how could that help when it hurt , but it did and I'm grateful to this day for the blend of love and tough love I recieved . 

Anyway the topic got me curious ... so I went to the book I know ( for Me ) is the truth . 

I wanted to read and see what the bible says about tough love. Was their always kindness in the bible , if not , what changed their hearts . Was Jesus always loving and kind and gentle . So many questions I had inspired by posts here .  

At that point I was reminded of a poem that helped me in my quit that was entitled Tandem bike ride with God ( google if you wish ) or I believe I posted long long ago in the Christian quitters club . Like the tandem bike ride with a God that the author wrote about when I let Him lead the way , instead of me , I felt a peace beyond understanding and I enjoyed the ride . I surrendered to my quit like I knelt and surrendered to God and said my life is unmanageable , I need help . Lead the way .

I quit smoking with a help of a team . God , hard work and action but He led the way . I didn't like it at first nor did I like having to quit an addiction because I leaned on my cigarette for dear lfe to get through life but I wasn't living life ! I was hating life the way it was . I was a broken mess , physically , spiritually and emotionally and this higher power I resisted so many years and ignored and frankly didn't trust changed my life .

Then lol funny thing there was a quit smoking site waiting for me on the wings but first there were people and circumstances my higher power brought into my path both Christian and non Christian that helped me come to the point I knew I needed to quit smoking . And my fear caused panic and I felt hopeless , and. Had no where to go but to trust that higher power I know as God . That's a long story short . So back to the reason for thIs post ..
tough love ..

Tough love . What is it , what does it mean , is it ok , is it mean ? People say love is patient , love is kind , but what does the bible say about tough love and how will , or can "love" help us in our quits and in our lives. What is love ? Is it just being kind , patient , not boasting , being forgiving , holding no right or wrongs or grievances ...those are discriptive words but what ... is ...love according to the book of truth .
So many say they need love , kindness and gentleness for support . Why do they anger at the words tough love ? I know why I did . Recognizing that  was the first step to healing .

Taken from : got questions .org . What does the bible say about tough love .
As Christ told us, “Broad is the road that leads to destruction” and many will be on it (Matthew 7:13). A strong dose of tough love may be the most appropriate recourse to help one get off the road of destruction, especially if he’s been on it for a while.

I will leave it there and maybe like me you might be interested to read from the master . He is truth , life and love . One who will always be there when no one else is .

Could I live life without a cigarette ug ! Scary .. but I can tell you ... I'm coming up on ten years quit . I can and I am and with my higher power prayerfully I will forever .

Another book worth reading to help your quit , or at least it helped mine , and many of you I know will know it too is pilgrims progress . There is a wonderful kids version out of this book FYI under a different title .. let me look for .. oh oh I think it's called the incredible journey .. it's a simpler read but great for adults as well .  I will post and clarify that here later ..

k , I'm sorry if this isn't making sense today , I maybe shouldn't post , kind of an off day thinking wise for me .. oh the joys of covid ! 

To admin if this should be moved let me know or even deleted let me know .. will do . Thanks for reading if you have but more so thanks for letting me write . 

Yall tough love love I think in love is ok .. don't be defensive , we are just trying to help as best we can .. we aren't perfect and don't know you , so your responsibility to take what helps your quit and  leave the rest because it maybe is something your fellow quitter will be grateful for .