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Vent tent

Maki
Member
4 19 192

Definitely ready for this to be over . I am missing going somewhere , hey anywhere , missing people , missing conversation, and grocery shopping , yet grateful I have here , the Ex and you ( thanks for listening , for sharing , for inspiration ) . Grateful for video calls ( took a drive in the mountains yesterday with my son  ) I'm grateful for a new grocery delivery service run by medical students for PID patients cause I'm getting hungry , bored hungry lol . I'm bored a lot these days , seems no use , yet much I could do , but why bother . I am tired of tired , tired of all dressed up and nowhere to go , or just in casuals all day , tired because it's 4:36 and I've only slept an hour tonight . Why ! Why ! Why ! Lol . Days are long enough , now night too lol Why ! Oh why !

Oh I am tired of complaining , but sometimes a good vent makes me appreciate what I do have even more .It could be worse . Grateful for what I have but sad we are all hurting , strong in my belief we can get through this ....yet times 

I want to throw in the towel and take risks  but then I think of the people I might make sick so I stay home with my music , with me , myself ,  I , and the poochie which doesn't talk either .  She doesn't even bark . I'm grateful cause that could be worse   I miss the outside world no doubt about it but I know I'm not alone in that . We all do . Grateful I think for the first time ever , for this week I will be going to the hospital again for my monthly port flush and blood work , grateful for lousy veins because had I had good ones wouldn't need the port and the port flush has go be looked after , so hey for the first time in a month 3rd in three I get out a bit .. at least a drive to and from the hospital and not just for a short walk while doggie pees  n poops , which btw you can laugh but I'm grateful for that cause all this bending to pick it it up and dispose of it is giving me exercise lol but .....soon that will end cause pup will be going home lol and she'll have her own yard to poop in , and as far as port flushes , ( not potty flushes ) they will send someone out to do that or me but I will be grateful for that too , cause cause one day I will not be getting younger .  At that stage I may need diapers . Age has a thing about catching up , yet going back in time .

Oh this has been fun hasn't it lol . Thanks for  ( bearing) with me lol .  I'm grateful I remembered the old Q vent tent , it sure came in handy tonight at 5:09 a.m.  Tic tock. 

Now clocks ..lol they used to help me sleep but , I'm grateful , now we have cell phones . Ok I'll stop ... now see I just made you grateful  ( jus kidding )  but I made you smile ...  I think , I hope .

Isn't being grateful better than being grumpy ...... Oh today is going to be a good day . I will get an afternoon nap in  

Last thought ... a 1/2 hour and to go and I'll smell the coffee perkin  and how grateful I am I have had my morning coffee ...without cigarettes ...

                 for 8 years 11 months and counting .

                                                                         Life is good   

If you need to vent too today go ahead , it's all good ,  it's healthy sometimes , but remember stay grateful , stay safe , stay quit .  

Odaat

            We will get through . 

19 Comments
About the Author
Smoker of 28 years . COPD recipient . My biggest help to quit was reading other successful quitters testimony as well as other quitters who would not give up and kept coming back determined to win . Also , some really hard work and helping others . I’ll have a thirteen years quit June 30 , 2024 . Biggest lesson learned : I learned that the “Just one” lesson is the key to everyone’s quit . Having “ none” not one puff , is the easy way to quit smoking . Post for help if it gets hard and before you have to own up to giving your quit away because if you do your quit can be saved . After the fact starts day one all over .I can’t tell you enough how worth it that is . Quit tools : Made use of my strengths and improved upon my weaknesses . Quit benefits , more time with my family , better quality of life , better self image . How I kept the quit : one day at a time , one step at a time . I told myself like a broken record : “ Don’t smoke ; Do something different “ then literally went and did something different other than smoking “ . Quitting is not complicated .It is really simply one word ( not one puff ever ) or nope , however , it will be the process of self discovery in this journey as you figure out things for yourself that can complicate things . How long will that be ? Well we are all different and we come from different backgrounds and smoked for different reasons so no one can really tell you when it will get easier for you only that it will . Be patient with yourself . Who cares how long it takes anyway because we all came to quit forever . This quit is for life , your life , so embrace it , welcome it , it’s the best thing you will ever do for yourself . The money you save get a bucket list of little rewards and big ones and do them . Change the things you can . Life is worth living . This gets easier , oh my gosh , so much much easier . Give it a season , give it two and you’ll never want to let go of your quit I promise you that . It’s wonderful , absolutely wonderful to be free . Quitting btw was the hardest thing I’ve ever done just like everyone here . I shed buckets of tears for weeks , yelled into a pillow , stuck my head into a cold bucket of water and paced aimlessly in head fog . Was it worth it , every bit of it ! Biggest improvement : , my health , the relationship with my family ( all non smokers thank goodness ) and finances . When I started 2011. I was walking three blocks with the use of inhalers for copd . Latest accomplishment : still on the inhalers no further advancement of copd . June 1 2023. Did my first 10 k . Next goal is my second 10k by the end of 2024 . I’m 68 years years young and I’m an Ex smoker . I was able to take three trips ( out of country ) with my family because I quit smoking . Time I never would have had had I not quit . Money from quitting paid for them . I want to say you are in control , take your power back from cigarettes from vaping or any addiction you might have . Life awaits you , don’t let it pass you by . Make the decision to stop and one day that light will shine upon you and make you a whole new you . Thank you to Quitnet members and Ex members for the support and encouragement to quit and stay quit . That along with my desire never to smoke again has given me a life long successful quit . No turning back , ever .