Hello Everyone, I have truly missed you. Yet not enough to reach out to you instead of looking at my husband at midnight on Thursday and stating I'll just quit again on Monday. I knew alcohol would cause a problem, thought I was prepared but not true. I will not blame the person who kept trying to hide the cigarette from me, but would not walk away from the conversation to smoke. I blame that nicodemon that saw his entry and made it.
I will not be angry or upset with myself, or feel guilty. All these feelings will lead to a relapse again. I will take time to examine them. My family are great encouragers without trying. They have been around the smokers all their lives so when the smokers leave the house the family follows. It did start a lot of games Frisbee, Horseshoes, ladder toss, washer toss.
I will however apologise for getting cocky and not following my own advice. I also know that with this quit I have to make a choice of how I drink or if I drink in social settings. Drinking at home with my husband isn't a problem, he quit long ago and has never had a problem. He is a mind of matter type of guy. I jump in with both feet and as usual the s*&( was deep.
I do know that God has forgiven me my slip. I know that Jesus will walk beside me as I build each new day. Those 22 days I left behind are not a loss they are a lesson. I pray I am smart enough to learn.
Today is Day 1. I will let you know that I won it in the morning.
Pam
