Hello all. Day four here and first time blog. I can't believe four days so far, I'm amazed with my new journey. I won't lie or sugarcoat it, it's been hard and a struggle. But through commitment and eduacation and this awesome EXcommunity I'm feeling confident. The first 48 hours was personally the hardest. Time seemed to stop, I felt lost and empty, irritable restless border line certified crazy! I can't remember me at a time never smoking it's all I can remember. All this time it's been my toxic, fake friend always there for me, but slowly killing me and insuring I'd always need it in my life. It is getting less, all the crazy feelings. One day at a time. I am an addict, I was controlled, my day was controlled, I was not free. I am working one step at a time to achieve my freedom once again before this drug had me. When I was kid smoking was the normal thing. You could pretty much do it everywhere still, I grew up thinking and being told it's ok. Small village, as a kid I could literally go buy my mom smokes no questions asked. I thank you for your support and no judgment and for being here. I chose not to smoke and I chose to embrace this new chapter.