Iamkfaz

The End of Week Two

Blog Post created by Iamkfaz on Jun 21, 2017

Good Morning,

 

I am back from my camping trip.  I had a great time and some great cravings and never smoked.  Today I am 16 days smoke free.  I went to Eastern Washington for my sister-in-law's graduation from nursing school.  There were a lot of people around most of the whole time.  Here are some interesting things I learned during this trip:

 

Generally flying is so much easier as a non-smoker (I will get back to this a bit later)

It was wonderful not be the only smoker at a party - in fact no one was smoking

I can now clearly identify when and why I would smoke without smoking

There are some people or situations you just have to learn to deal with without smoking

 

My trip there was much easier than I thought it was.  As a smoker, flying was difficult with the long periods of time of not be able to smoke.  As an ex-smoker, flying was much easier and I was much calmer.  My challenge came on my return trip.  I missed my non-stop flight home.  I was to return at 7:30AM but I didn't get home until 7:30PM.  Before I quit I would have been a wreck.  I was upset about this but was able to remain calm and did not feel the need to leave the airport to smoke.  I was able to identify the moments when that feeling came up, what I would have done - told myself it was an illusion and it will pass...it always passed.

 

During all the gatherings I was surprised to notice that no one in that group of over 50 people smoked and neither was I.  I didn't have to leave the party or the graduation ceremony to have a smoke.  I didn't feel like an outcast.  Again, I was able to identify the moment when that craving came up and what I would have done if I was still smoker and then I could let it go.

 

The most difficult part was a family member who has to ability to drive me crazy.  A person who believes they know everything and needs to prove it to you ALL THE TIME.  I spent numerous hours in the car with this person and by the end of my trip my resolve was weakening.  I felt trapped, unable to end the tension I was feeling.  The higher my tension got the harder everything became.  In order to cope I went back to a meditation trick of rubbing my thumb and first finger together which helps me calm and just repeating "I can do this, it's all an illusion".  I didn't smoke but I was very happy to get away from this person. 

 

This person will be in my life for sometime.  I have to learn to handle it and I think this past weekend helped me to see I can survive it without smoking and without breaking something or saying something not helpful.

 

On another note, I am still having problems with my voice.  I think I'm going to have to see a doctor about this.

 

I am glad to be back here, I missed my daily community. 

 

Karyn

Outcomes