Gotdance363

Back to day one

Blog Post created by Gotdance363 on Aug 23, 2020

I don't know how to start this besides saying I am back to day one...I made it 140 some days and started nicotine again...it's funny how it can be a bit sneaky. You see my quit was actually going super well, yeah the first month definitely was a challenge especially those first few days but after a while it really did get easier! And I really did feel free for the first time in over ten years I didn't feel the constant craving for a cig or vape. Problem was I was hanging out again with people who smoked and I remember the first puff I had after my quit. I had a few drinks and said what the heck I can handle one puff. The next day I was like wow look at that I had one puff of a cig and I feel great today no cravings at all. And I little voice in my head said see you can handle an occasional cigarette. That voice was oh so wrong. The next couples times I'd hang out with friends who smoked I would take a drag which would turn into two, which would turn into a whole cigarette myself. Before I knew it I bought myself a pack (just for the occasional use of course). And that's how it started and hear I am now disappointed in myself because I bought a juul (which has way more nicotine then my system is use to) and now I need to quit again... I bought myself the patch because that is how I quit this first time successfully-ish. And now I just need to find the willpower to quit again. I attempted to quit yesterday and that lasted two hours before I broke down and got another juul thing. Ugh I'm frustrated and how this all came about, but trying to stay positive. I read more stories on other people and from reading I knew better then to even have that first puff, but I guess something's you just have to live and learn through or at least I do .. sorry this is a little bit everywhere and my Grammer is not the best my brain is still processing how I ended up back at square one. I will get back on the train I will conquer this once again. Thanks for reading.

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