What happens when your expectations don’t happen? Do you keep on - or give up? “But they said the cravings would lessen after....”
We’re not lying to you. The craving DO lessen. The problem is you don’t realize it, because it's a subtle process. You think that after X number of days you’re suddenly gonna pass a magic timeline of cravings and they'll all disappear. Not so. They ease and ebb and grow and flow and ebb again. That is the nature of cravings and also the nature of this quitting journey.
I personally thought that I’d suddenly reach a moment when ALL CRAVINGS WERE OVER, DONE, GONE! And Yippeee! Wish I could tell you that was the case, but it ain’t.
We give you these happy points of reference (3 days, a week, No Man’s Land...) to keep you going in your quit. To keep you hopeful. To keep you psychologically eager and active in pursuing the positives along the way.
There are monumental crossings that we are unaware of in life When we cross the Continental Divide (in New Mexico) do we grasp it in any way but intellectually? Do we feel it? No. When we cross the International Dateline in a plane do we sense it? No.
Every newbie wants to know HOW LONG??? will it take??? It takes as long as it takes. For You. The question you need to ask and answer for yourself is: ”Am I willing to hang on as long as it takes? No matter what?” If you aren’t - you won’t make it. Truth. ‘Cause that’s what it takes. Each quit is different. Some fight the process longer, some accept the rite of passage sooner, some didn’t make a strong enough preparation, some come to a stress crisis and blow it. But ALL successful long-term quitters have accepted that it will take as long as it takes to get to that place of Freedom.
How long will it take to get over the cravings? To get to the point where you can say “I’m free” - there is no specific time. Because this is a journey. Not an event. The day you put them down is THE EVENT. The day after that begins your journey to freedom.
And that journey is incredibly empowering. IF and only IF you want it to be. Otherwise it can be a journey of merely hope, whining, loss and relapse. Your quit journey is as YOU make it. You’re in charge. Truly. We can help to try to attract your mind to the positives of it, and distract your mind from the negatives - but ultimately it’s up to you. If you want to dwell in whining mode, you will. If you want to get over it ASAP - you will. If you read the blogs here you will learn of the type of mindset that makes it and the mindset that fails. They’re as clear as day.
What’s your choice? IN (with all the costs) or OUT with all the relapses and ‘wish I had,’ ‘wish I could,’ ‘back again," ‘I know better,’ ‘praying that THIS time...’...
My point is - be proactive, take the reins, don’t let yourself be a victim to your addiction. Choose the way you want to experience quitting. When you understand that quitting is a choice - and part of that choice is in how you view it - you’ll know YOU are in control. Hang in!