At least for now. My Dad and step Mom have some close friends that I have grown to live over the years. One couple in particular hold my heart because they helped so much when my father suffered a blown cranial aneurysm almost a year after my sister had a double one. This man and his wife are the cutest couple and love each other so much it is almost surreal. She has dementia and has been steadily getting worse. I honestly am not 100% sure she remembered me, but I have reason to think she's in there, trapped in her own brain. I had to say goodbye this evening since I am flying home tomorrow and it left me crying, once I got outside. She was crying and telling me she loved me. I had to tell her not to cry, that I would see her soon. I told her to smile because she is gorgeous and she has many who love her and she lived in such a beautiful place. It broke my heart because I may never see her again. But I didn't smoke. The thought crossed my mind and I simply told my addicted self that a cigarette won't bring her mind back, won't help him take care of her and wouldn't ease my hurt. I am leaking as I think about their life now, but I don't want to smoke. Amazing.
Experiences like this show me that if you love someone, don't forget to tell and show them. When you are lucky enough to find your partner in life, don't take a minute for granted.
That helped....I think I will escape into a book and hopefully sleep soon. Goodnight my friends.