~~When you start to feel like things should have been better this year, remember the mountains and valleys that got you here. They are no accidents and those moments weren't in vain. You are not the same. You have grown and you are growing. You are breathing, you are living. You are wrapped in endless, boundless grace and things WILL get better. There is more to you than yesterday.~~ Morgan Harper Nichols
You may be finding it hard to quit smoking. Every time you 'think' you've quit, it's only lasted for a few weeks or fewer days. You think you're letting people down who have supported you and encouraged you and shown you how to quit. You think no one understands what you're going through.....because, maybe, you don't understand what you're going through. You don't understand why others seem to quit so beautifully while you struggle each and every day until you simply can't do it anymore. You return to smoking but promise yourself you will quit again....when you are ready.
These moments you are experiencing with your quit are not in vain....because they've changed you. You've grown without even realizing it. An awareness has entered your mind, your heart, and maybe even your very soul and opened up possibilities that you didn't even know were there when you were a smoker.
You may still be smoking, but think about all you know now. That there is a world out there for you that doesn't involve being chained to a habit that is harming you. You have endless support here from people who were where you are right now. You know quitting is possible. All of this information has changed you in a subtle yet undeniable way. Because now you can't go back to smoking without the nagging thought of "I need to quit this" or even "I shouldn't be smoking".
You, my friend, truly are wrapped in endless, boundless grace. And that means that your time WILL come. You will have your 'ah-ha' moment when the door to quitting is simply there and you can walk through...easily and readily. That won't mean that there won't be struggles....but it does mean that you won't go back to smoking. Quitting is not going back no matter what's happening in your life. That's all. You won't smoke.
There is more to you than yesterday and that more will keep growing. Have faith that quitting will happen....that you will MAKE it happen....at the exact right time you are supposed to quit. The rest? The slips, the relapse, the hesitations? They are the things that change you....they are the moments that aren't in vain...they are how you grow.
So be kind to yourself, please. And rather than battling your thoughts and hating your actions, love that growth and nurture the possibilities that are within you. Feel better about who you are and what you are capable of doing. You will get there.
I say prayers for us. For the elders to always love their quits, for the new quitters to hang in there one day at a time, for the smokers to remember there is more to you than yesterday. You are all remarkable.