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Share your quitting journey

Please Help me!!

Cricket
Member
4 29 332

I have been having a VERY bad week regarding cravings!   The only thing keeping me grounded is My art (Witch is going very well!)  Today was very close.  I was ready to swallow my pride and bum a cigarette from someone on the block!  I was literally on the prowel!  I went for a walk looking, but somehow you guys went with me!!  I was feeling guilty saying aloud mind you, NOPE...Not one puff EVER!"  And picturing your dissapointment, but still... I was looking.  Then I got sidetracked by my art!  At the house I was going to ask for a cigarette, there was a really nice stroller at the curb!  It was in good shape and had a cup holder and a diaper bag net!  I walked up to the house and was a little wild eyed over the ashtray on the porch with a half of cigarette in the ashtray.  I walked past it, knocked on the door and asked about the stroller.  She said there was nothing wrong with it she just didn't need it anymore, and yes I could have it!  I said thanks! AND walked past the ashtray again back out to the street to collect my prize!!  She came out of the house walked over to the ashtray and LIT the cigarette!!  I wrestled with my conscience for what seemed a long time, but in reality it must have been only 15 or 30 seconds.  I wanted to ask her to give me a cigarette!  But GOD IS GOOD!  My art was the trade off bargin my husband and I struck when I agreed to quit.  He is letting me have the money I would have spent on cigarettes to go towards my art. When I was tempted by the devil to go find a cigarette He offered me a wonderful gift!  All of this came to me as I watched her light that cigarette.... (like in slow motion)  I took my stroller and walked home thanking God for loving me!!  I won the day!  I have been in alot of pain because of tooth and earache, and I cant chew my gum...I will go to store tomorrow and see if I can get some lozenges...My whole system is off and I haven't slept in a week!

29 Comments
About the Author
1st quit date 2/10/18 Determined to be free 40 hour relasp reset: 2ed quit date 8/17/18 Greatful for support Working on seeing myself Without tobacco in my life