As I approach a new mile stone in my quit of four months, I find myself reflecting on the journey so far. How those first hard days became a memory just as I always believed they would. How the days really did become easier with the passage of time and a realization that my world is no longer a world with cigarettes in it. This in itself makes me happy.
I think of those who I took the journey with and wonder about those who have taken a different path in life. The one’s who chose not to complete the journey for whatever reason. And then the one’s who just kind of faded away. My hope is that they are still smoke free and living a life of freedom. We all deserve life over death. We all deserve to live free of our addictions. All we have to do is want that freedom badly enough and then go for it!
I think of how the addict within has changed over time. I think of how I’ve changed over time as well. For together my inner addict and myself have been on the same journey. We have fought each other as we progressed onward. He has tested my resolve and I have won.
And so I move on, each day bringing a new commitment to my quit. Each day convincing me that freedom is still attainable simply by my actions on that day. I live the urges when they choose to appear. I stay aware of them and then dismiss them, knowing that with each one I dismiss I come closer to that final freedom that I want so badly.
I know it’s there. Right over the horizon, beckoning to me with every breath of new life that I take. I see the mountaintop and it is indeed much closer now. I know in the very depths of my soul that this journey is indeed worth taking.
And then I think of all of you who are just starting out. The confusion and yes, sometimes wonder that we feel as we learn ourselves. As we learn just how strong our resolve is. I think of what you might be feeling right now and long to ease your burden as the internal conflict begins. I want so badly to reassure you that the path really does get easier and I understand now that these things can only be believable if told to you by someone who’s been there.
Nicotine addiction is indeed a strong addiction but it’s one that can be beat. All it takes is a belief in ourselves and a desire to live a life free of the shackles of addiction. It takes a commitment and a desire to see yourselves in a world without cigarettes. Together we can reinforce what is already within you but the bottom line is that only you can break free of your addiction. Only you can stand strong. Only you can keep yourself from giving in.
And then I look to those ahead of me and pick up all of the wisdom that I can for to know what the path is like around that next bend can propel us onward in our quest. It can take the mystery from it. And when we know what’s ahead then we can prepare for it. We can learn from it and then we can pass that knowledge to others who might need it. I’m grateful for that knowledge and because of this I will use it as intended. I will not demean that knowledge by not succeeding. For at times when others believe in us that can help us to build a believe in ourselves.
It’s been an amazing journey thus far and one I intend to finish!
See you all on the top of Mt. Freedom!!