Day 38
Everything is getting very dark and my list of negative stuff is getting longer.
I can nip a smoking thought in the bud, but I can't stop crying.
I have learnt that a smoke or a nicotine chew doesn't stop the dark descending or things falling apart.
I have mowed the lawn, been to a dance exercise class, had my granddaughter to stay for the weekend.
I am doing all the right things, yet I am still suffering over my suffering.
I want to want to do stuff instead of forcing myself.
I hope this is the blackest day. I got an appointment with the Doctor tomorrow just in case it's not.
Feeble smile.