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Share your quitting journey

What's next?

Christine13
Member
5 8 76

Was totally sad today, just missing Brian so much.  Feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff I have to take care of myself.

But..........it'll be what it'll be.  He's not here, he's not coming back.   It's up to ME, what I do and how I live my life.

I can either wallow in depression or begin to move forward.  I'm lost, please god, help me find my way.  Yesterday I was also in a funk, I went to the park, and just as I was driving past there was a beautiful bride kissing her new husband, the bridesmaids were wearing long maroon dresses.  A new beginning for them, and a new beginning for me.  I sat by the river for a few minutes and then walked and there was a whole school of kids playing in the field on the other side of the road.  Makes me feel good just thinking about it.  Today I choose not to smoke, I will get through this day, with a little help from my friends.  On a fun note I have something to look forward to coming up in Dec.  I have booked a trip to see my daughter and son-in-law and grandson in California.  I won't be here the same day Brian passed away, but will be in the loving arms of my family.  Now if that isn't the best reason to keep my quit I don't know what is???

8 Comments
About the Author
I'm a widow now, my husband passed away January 1, 2018 He died of COPD, and pre leukemia and the flu. He quit smoking 15 years ago which gave him extra time. I am a mother, and grandmother. I have smoked for 47 years. I am going to have my forever quit and I'm doing it for me and my two daughters so I can live longer and be with them. I like to read, swim, garden, crochet, paint and doodle. I also enjoy walking and visiting with friends and family. I am 100% making this my last quit. I have been in denial about what smoking has done to me and my kids. I must make a new life for myself and it doesn't include cigarettes. I may already have COPD, but have not been officially diagnosed.