Finally I am looking forward to the challenge of remaining smoke free. Friday will be what would have been our 44th wedding anniversary. It's only been 4 months since Brian passed. I started over yesterday, and I am willing to really challenge all my moods and emotions without the cancer sticks. Last week was a heck of a week, with much anxiety and panic about everything. It will only happen now, because I'm willing to start a new life without Brian and do the things I really need to do to stay quit. Already my lungs feel better and now I have my garden to work in and the nice weather to appreciate. So many people here have been kind to me, and patient and supportive. I am very grateful.
I pretty much isolated myself last week because I was feeling so terrible. I spent too many days alone, and will take steps to avoid that in the week coming up. I have been here a long time, and should have many years quit by now.
If it weren't for my EX family to keep me trying I would have given up a long time ago. So now there is no more try, there is only do! xoxo