Writing to myself to make myself remember and keep strong at the decisions I've made. Seems so ridiculous that one even has to make such entries and such back patting to one self but after two failed attempts I appreciate the difficulties one faces when quitting smoking.
I now know why it is so different this time round, easier in some ways but not that much easier. I can recognize that I now wake up and do not think of cigarettes straight away...I however fear sitting by myself at a cafe, reading a book, writing, or just thinking seriously about any matter and this shows just how attached me and cigarettes are. What a strong, long relationship have we nurtured...the many times we have been angered at each other, small breakups and then two serious attempts to go our separate paths.
Yet, you pry on me and wait for me to bring my guard down...and that shows that you were not in this relationship to bring me any joy, any good for you also have to let go of me...let me break free, like a good boyfriend would do!