Thank for all the emails. I know I haven’t been on site for awhile. I’m sorry. Don’t mean to neglect my friends and not to try to help newbies. We are all going through so much right now. Smoking will NOT change anything. Please don’t give yourself permission. Please say NOPE. I’m having cravings after all this time. 389 DOF I can’t believe they come on strong and pass quickly. But they come. I’m even getting those darn smoking dreams. I haven’t been sleeping well and I’m very anxious and sometimes depressed. Trying hard to keep busy. I have to self quarantine (doctors orders due too all my lung issues from smoking). Using more oxygen. I only go in my yard when it doesn’t rain and it rains a lot. I’m a people person and I miss people. I’m lonely. I miss my family and friends. I miss strangers. I talk to everyone. Well I used to. I’m writing this so if I put down the words they won’t stay inside of me. So many tragic things going on across our country. I live in NJ and things are not good here. I’m from NY and still have family there too. Things are not good in NY either. We have had 3 deaths and no funerals. I went out once to my doctor and swerved not to hit a deer. I hit the traffic light and smashed up my new car. I’m ok. Just bruised. The deer is fine. Sorry for being so down. It’s a sign of the times. We have to stay strong and God will see us through this together. I will not smoke I will not!!
