Out for a lovely walk with a friend and I found a brand new opened pack of cigarettes on the edge of the sidewalk. I picked it up, lifted the top, saw the perfect rows, and my whole life flashed before my eyes.
In a nano-second I imagined picking one out, lighting it up (with my non-existent lighter), and inhaling poison.
In the next nano-second I imagined all my Days of Freedom spinning backward to "1" again. I saw myself stinking up my charming little apartment. I felt myself cough. I put the pack in my pocket, laughed at myself, and threw it out whole into the next dumpster I saw.
At first I was appalled at those two nano-seconds of temptation. But it was a great lesson. Now I know for sure that temptation will always come, but there's nothing to fear from it. Even if my mind automatically goes into imagining mode, I won't let it give me permission to act on it.
I know that a big part of the fear of quitting is being too weak to commit to a quit or fearing the feelings that come afterward. They're just lies that our addiction tries to get us to believe. We are not weak, and fear is not more powerful than we are!
