For many, many years, I wanted at some point to be a non smoker. The thing is,
I never tried to be. I kept on smoking. At this point in time, 2020, I smoked for half of my life. Great. The good thing is, I have not smoked for half of it! Yay! I was not a casual smoker.
I always smoked. It was not till I got to Quitnet that I learned that the smoking was making me want to smoke more. Each cigarette was making me want another. It wasn't that I liked it so much. It was that the last cigarette made me want the next. It took care of the withdrawal from the cigarette before it and put me in a state to go into withdrawals again. Every 15 minutes.
My addicted body wanted it and made me feel that deep down in my soul I wanted it first and foremost and always and forever. I had a commitment to cigarettes unlike in many of my relationships. Cigarettes first. We have all been there. I was there. Just because I have not smoked for 19 years does not mean I did not smoke long and hard. I did.
For a year or so I used the patch and gum. It did not work for me. I would not follow the directions and although I did not smoke w the patch on, I would take it off , smoke a bunch and then put a new one on. I rewarded myself for not smoking w cigarettes. I doubt if during this time I ever went a day without smoking. Hmmm well obviously I did not get rid of the cigarettes, either.
For me, getting nicotine out of my body was best. I do think NRT is beneficial and the studies say it is best, even recent studies saying a combo of the patch and a little gum can help. It was not for me.
For me learning that I could not smoke was key. No Smoking. None. NOT one Puff. Yes it was difficult to start with. I chewed a lot of gum and I stayed on the Q a lot.
I no longer remember when it quit being a part of my life. I do not think about smoking. Not me smoking. It is not a threat to me. It is not looming out there. It is not that monkey on my back. It is and has been just out of my life. Something that no longer really exists for me. Yes, I smoked. Yes, I get checked by the Dr every year, etc. Yes, it happened. It is not something that I fear now, not something I am afraid of. For all practical purposes it is gone. My story and I am talking about me.
I can appreciate that many of you will never feel this way and that is fine. The most important thing is that you never take that puff.
I can understand what you all go through. I was there. I have been there. I did it. The hard part for any of us is saying "I am not going to smoke anymore" and then following through on that, not smoking anymore.
The help is here at Become an Ex and other social media, just like it was for me at Quitnet. I doubt I could have quit without the social media. I only read posts because I was too shy to post. I saw people doing it and it gave me hope that it could actually be done, that perchance I could actually be like them and do it. That is what kept me going, minute by minute. I will always remember looking at the people with three days and wondering how in the world I could ever get that far, if I could ever possibly do it... we are talking three days.
Let social media help you Quit and stay Quit. Everything you need to help you is right here.
Thank you, all of you for being with me on this road. Although I do not need support to not smoke, I appreciate and value the relationships and the interaction that we have. It means a lot to me, more than you will ever know. Thank you! We do this together!
Pic: Party Hat from Cliff. 19 Years Quit! Yay! Onward! and thank you every one so much!
Post originally posted on NOPE365
I hope I have posted this in the right place. Hi all! Love you and miss you!!
And no smoking to every one, one and all! If I can do it, anyone can do it!!